My mom is only 70, but has advanced dementia. She is wheelchair bound, incontinent, does not speak, does not feed/bathe herself. Nothing. You can be right next to her trying to talk to her and she is just vacantly staring off. If you want her to see you, you have to get in her line of vision, and even then, she may not see you.
The guilt part...I very much want her to now be with the Lord. She has no quality of life and is a shell. She has voiced many times before she got sick that she never wanted that kind of life or to be a burden on her children. But my #1 reason for wanting her released is for myself, and #2 for her. She lives in a nursing home, as I am unable to care for her, or else I would. But all her affairs that I have to handle cause me great anxiety on a daily basis, that I am missing out on my own life and it's all I think about. Does this make me bad/selfish to feel this way? To want this for myself before her? I've been beating myself up over this.