Thank you all for reading this whine about my interactions with my 82 year old, widowed mother. I am 62. I feel tonight so burdened, guilty, sad, old, ashamed and wretched. All because I drove the hours drive to my mother's house and spent several hours with her and her latest DRAMA. The latest of her Many phones not working again. Bah. She can't work it. Has never learned, will never learn and creates a storm around this. Acts all nice and calm and polite because her friend turns up while I am there and then when said friend left, she tells me she heard from my son who rang her recently to ask if I, yes me, her daughter, had been OFFERING MORE SUPPORT LATELY. And meekly informs him oh yes. I am not an elastic stocking. But her flying monkeys have now got to him to spread her endless neediness and moaning and criticising even further. I think she is a narcissist. Her flying monkeys are her two other daughters. They are either bullying and fighting with her or not speaking to her. Neither has talked to me for years. I won't be coerced and I don't coerce or try to control my mother. I try to be a gray rock when with her. Sometimes this is really protective and helpful. However today she got her snipe in. Letting me know her, her monkeys and my dear son who I have an easy friendly relationship with, have ALL been in the Judgement Mob on me for not paying her Enough blasted attention. Where does the poison stop flowing. All the needs and wants that she has expressed over the 16 years since dad, her husband, died, I have heard. Nothing is ever finished, right, good enough, new enough, straight enough, etc etc. I have offered practical solutions to some of her problems i. e. I said I could re-landscape her yard using my time and money, to make a low maintenance garden but NO, the lawns and Roses must stay so she can continue to complain about the Pruning and How The Lawn Looks Scruffy. I asked her to move in with my daughter and me and put my home up for sale so we could buy a bit bigger one. She said yes. She is old, ill and alone and I hoped this plan would be a win/win. Suddenly one day some months later in front of a group of extended family she announced loudly that she would not be moving in with me in a belligerent voice. Did not bother informing me one on one. Luckily I had not sold my home. I was deeply hurt. Later she said to me that she would not live where I was because "the family" would look down on her. I have a nice house in a retirement park and a good job in a hospital. I was wounded again. Yet she keeps saying she wants to see me and my adult daughters and son and tells people that I am the only one who does not push her around. YET I know she trash talks me to her friends. She has a kind of slowwww leaukaemia called CLL. I feel vile saying this but I wish she could just cark it. I love her but I don't like her and my pain will not end soon. Thank you for listening.