I feel like I’m being used by my boyfriend and his siblings and don't know what to do.


My boy friend is not as understanding when its come to me caring for his mother! I feel like I’m being forced to care for her I don’t want to be responsible for her life any more! I have two young girls who I feel like I’m putting on the back burner, I am 700 miles away from family, and starting to feel like I’m being used by him and his siblings!



What doesn’t your boyfriend understand? That she’s his mother and his responsibility? Did he sign up to take care of her and then pass the job on to you? I understand that if his mother needs personal care, he may not be comfortable with that, but there are Home health care people who can come to your house and do that. Are his sibs all men? If there’s a sister, Mom’s personal care should be up to her.

You can only be used if you let yourself be. The next time you find yourself in the trenches with her, suddenly remember you promised to take your kids to the park, zoo or library. School is starting soon. Gosh, they need help with their homework! There’s a PTA meeting!

You don’t need anyone to be “understanding”. All you need to say is “No more.”
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to Ahmijoy

Most of the posters here are seniors. I am 68. If you feel like you are being used, you probably are. Your children are your priority. Call family and ask if you can come home. That you need to get your life back on track and need some help. Then tell boy friiend its not working out and why. I really can understand how this happened but he and his sibs need to take the reins. If he really loved you, he would understand. Yes, its going to be hard but better now before resentment really kicks in and then its being mad about everything.
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Reply to JoAnn29

Sounds like you are being taken for granted by boyfriend and his family. Time for a change where you make YOUR family YOUR top priority. We see it often on this site.
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Reply to gladimhere

The answer is in their actions.

You know what the situation really is and it is in your power to continue or to make your children your 1st priority.

Best of luck dealing with the truth of the matter, I know you feel you loose either way, but think of your children, the example they are getting from this.

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Reply to Isthisrealyreal