I don't know if I should make Mom aware that she has dementia (we weren't told what kind was suspected)? Need advice.

Insist that her neurologist's protocol is for your mom to have an M.R.I., which is typically the gold standard for brain functionality.

question to you: what is your goal in telling her she has dementia?
Naming a set of symptoms (x disease) does Not a solution create.
Therefore, will telling your Mother this medical tentative diagnosis ie label..help her life in any regard?
I am doubtful

Rispiradol was developed for treating schizrophenics. Studies on elderly suffering dementia diseases are mixed as to its effectiveness in improving quality of health & life in elderly suffering Dementia. It has many severe side effects including parkinsonism symptoms , tremor, drooling, & many others very distressing problems
In most cases this medication when given to dementia patients causes worsening of the problems it is being taken for
You didn't mention what are other medications your Mother is taking.
There are medications that are known to induce delirium & lead to behavioral disturbances in patients with Alzheimers type dementia.
.eg. steroid and narcotic pain killers
Before prescribing a double dose of a medication that has at a moderate dose not brought any improvement is short sighted and medical folly;
The recommended dose of respiradol in elderly with Alzheimers type dementia is
1gm. Any more causes a great increase in serious side effects
It is appropriate to do a medical workup (blood test, physical exam) & make sure she doesn't have any infections eg bladder infection...as this can also cause increase in the behavior problems that one is taking the drug to treat.
Insomnia is one of the most common side effects of rispiradone
Sleep is 'the great Healer" of life.
Without deep sleep your Mother will deteriorate & pass away rapidly
You might consider making her a big pot of herb tea each day. Herbs are foods & will nourish the body & help to regulate her nervous system.
The recipe below I have seen work very well when people are bone tired yet can't sleep.
And alternate between agitation & apathy
1tspn to a cup. 1oz to a pint. Bring Distilled water to the boil.
Its important to drink & cook only with Distilled water. It is sold at all big markets & pharmacies next to the other waters.
Pour over the herbs. Stir & cover. Leave 10mins to overnight. Overnight is ideal. These herbs are foods & are completely harmless. They will not interfere/interact with the medications she may be taking at all.
Take 1 cup am & pm & more if possible
1 part lavender flower,
1 part Chamomile flowers (lavender is best)
1 part Nettle leaf.
Organic is preferable..And purchased loose. Measure the water & weigh the herb
Keep in glass container in the fridge for up to 3 days
Warm one mug at a time & add 1 spoon raw honey from your local area
This tea smells wonderful, tastes delicious, and brings a strengthening & calming of the nervous system...and deep sleep
Nettle Seeds (etsy.com) A teaspoon of the seeds swallowed twice daily would be a wonderful tonic also.
I recommend both of these foods (tea & nettle seeds) for both you & your Mother. They will benefit both of you in many regards
We are all to die...its the quality of life that is the key to a happy life
Best regards

Possibly someone has suggested this, but in addition to Bladder Infections causing confusion in the elderly, so will low levels of Vitamin B12 . Once we get over 50 our bodies may not absorb VB12 from food, etc. I can tell when my mom needs her monthly B12 injection, her confusion levels are much higher. She has her injection and within a couple of days she is much clearer. If you haven't already suggest to her gp to complete blood work, you might ask the GP to check her B12 levels as well as her thyroid. Both are checked through a blood test. My mom is 91 and has Dementia. When her GP diagnosed her, we were referred to a Geriatric Specialist. The Specialist was not keen on giving drugs that may or may not help, but will have side effects. The family was fine with her not taking drugs. Risk with minimal reward. My mom takes synthroid for her thyroid and low dose aspirin daily and once a month VB12 shots.
We all want to do what is best for our loved ones, however, it is concerning that the Dr is increasing her dose, especially for someone in their 90's.

I'm not sure what you would expect to happen by telling your mother this diagnosis. Is she already being care for by others? If so, then, I'd consider how keeping her safe and protected and made to feel secure might help her feel better. You can discuss it with her doctor, but, I'm not sure how how getting her to understand that she has a terrible condition would help. Also, she'll just forget, so it might be a daily thing of reminding her and making her feel bad day after day.

Based on what you said about the psychiatrist.....I'd inquire if this doctor has experience in treating geriatric patients who have dementia. IMO, that's important. The idea of continually bringing a ninety year old dementia patient into an office for multiple visits, is quite shocking.

I wouldn’t tell her. She is living in a different world when those episodes happen. If she doesn’t remember them, I don’t see the need to upset her. It’s like dementia; they advise to go into her world, don’t insist that she always live in yours. Best of luck, hon.

When my father was still able to understand, I would tell him he wasn’t crazy, his brain was just playing tricks on him and the doctor gave him medicine to take to make it stop doing that to him. He accepted this gratefully each time.

Another possible cause of sudden dementia symptoms could be bleeding ulcers, or elsewhere in digestive tract. I think any infection or dysfunction adds to the stress on the brain and can make symptoms suddenly worse.

I am writing from the patients point of view. I was diagnosed with Dementia/Prob ALZ based on MRI and Neuropsych exam at the age of 56. I'd lost my job after a 38 yr career. I knew something was wrong and complained of memory problems for the 5 yrs previous to my diagnosis 2 1/2 yrs ago. I personally think each family has to make the decision for themselves as to whether the patient should be told or not. I felt a breath of fresh air when I was given the diagnosis. Finally, I knew there was something really wrong, and no I wasn't crazy. Regrettably, I went through all the testing and received the results on my own. My DW was quite busy keeping a roof over our head and I felt I could do all of this on my own. Looking back, I should of had someone with me because the oral report given to me of the Neuropsych results, differed greatly from the written report I received in the mail. I encourage all facing this problem to always have another adult family member with them. Now, my DW attends each appointment with me and we discuss what the doctor told us following each meeting. I hope this is of some help to all that read Agingcare.

clb2930:
My husband suffers from dementia caused by PD. I belong to a caregivers support group of person's living with dementia, and also consult with many medical professionals. What I have learned is that most persons living with dementia don't know they have dementia. They know they can get confused, forget, and see or hear odd things, but they don't know it is their brain not functioning optimally. They really don't comprehend our reality vs. their reality. It is just their new normal. Read everything you can about dementia, research, and join a support group or two. Use humor and coping strategies to make your life easier during this stressful experience. Takes breaks from caregiving and take care of yourself. HUGS.