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She has incontinence so sometimes she rips off her briefs when they are dirty, she is unable to put another one on but she can put a small blanket over herself and/or a shirt over her chest but doesn't. When I say let's put something on, she does. I joke that she should move into a nudist colony because this naked lady behaviour has started to become her norm. I explain that I don't walk around naked in the house and that it's really not appropriate, especially if she is alone and someone comes to the door. She also turned away the new physical therapist last week, for no reason and then missed her Dr appt. Went by wheelchair van, checked in but then went clothes shopping because "she didn't want to wait".  Oh and she slipped out of bed this morning. Didn't hurt herself but this is becoming normal too. Like maybe 10xs in the last 4 months. She does have repeat UTIs.  Which she calls TUI's🙄 (her strokes) so maybe this is part of that? Or maybe this is something else? Her Dr isn't helping me.. though he did say he wanted to do a CAT scan to figure out why she has bowel incontinence but she has had that ever since her strokes..so I'm not sure why that would be necessary when they have her original ones from two years ago. It wasn't explained to me..just a VM left on my phone from the nurse.


But now she doesn't feel it..she will be sitting in her own feces and not even realize😐


So, Im not getting any help from anyone..I can't even get an aide from the VA agency to relieve me because they won't work with her anymore. I'm in the process of hiring an independent contractor but can only afford mornings. Anyway just wondering if anyone recognizes these signs? (BTW, she is not on painkillers or meds that would make her drowsy). O.K.,


Thanks!

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I’m sorry you’re going through this and your Mom is quite young. It sounds like she needs more round the clock supervision at this point. Sometimes dementia causes people to lose the sensations of going to the bathroom and they don’t know they’ve done it. Sitting in feces will cause the UTIs, which then can cause all sorts of bizarre behavior. She needs someone to assist her toileting schedule so it’s good you’re hiring an aid. Ideally she should be toileted every 3-4 waking hours. What do you do when she gets UTIs? A trip to the doctor for a culture and antibiotics? Falling out of bed is my first sign Mom has one. I don't think your Mom should be allowed to travel to appointments on her own...for her safety and also so you can be part of the discussion. Taking off to shop is not rational behavior especially for someone who needs assistance (although I’d rather shop than sit in a waiting room too, but the repercussions stop a more rational person from leaving) In fact I would call her doctor now and tell them everything you’ve told us.
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Sorry you haven’t gotten any more responses. I’ll comment again to bump this up.
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Hi Kristlynn
wow your mom needs help. This sounds like a vicious cycle.
I would follow the doctor’s orders and get the test or find another dr you have more confidence in.
Your mom sounds like she has dementia but the UTIs could cause those symptoms.
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