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He had cardiac arrest on 3/27/2018, and went without oxygen and it caused a stroke and also shut down his kidneys. Fortunately, he did not suffer from paralysis or any speech impairment. His motor skills are just slower. My main concern is this. My other brother became his medical power of attorney. He is extremely controlling. He believes that he has all rights to make all medical decisions for him. This includes choosing his family doctor and matthew is not comfortable with the physician. POA also wants to change or alter one of his medicines, even though he does not want to change or alter it. If he is able to make decisions on his own, why can't he? He actually is afraid to say anything to any healthcare staff because POA goes into every examination with him, and speaks for matt. Matt wants to talk to doctors to tell them this, but POA is always there. He gets no privacy. Matthew feels awkward because POA has given him a place to live and has kept him from being in poverty. But that doesn't make it right. What can I do? I truly believe that matthew knows that i have his best interest in mind and he trusts me. I need advice. Can anyone clarify the medical POA for me. It doesn't make since to not let a human make a decision if he is able to.

If the person is able to make his own decisions then he HAS made his own decision. He has weighed in his own mind what he has to lose and what he has to gain by saying to his doctor "To tell you the truth I am able to make my own decision on this, and I would like to" versus what he has to lose in his POA withdrawing a place to live. So, you see, he HAS made his own choice. That is assuming you are correct and he is perfectly able to make his own choice. If he is NOT capable of making this choice, then the Medical POA he appointed to act in his behalf is there to do so for him. I see you as a third person coming into this and perhaps there is some confusion now. I would stay out of it. You have said your brother has mental capability of making his own choice. If he tells you privately that he would like to change his medical POA to YOU, then that can be done. But there may of course be the repercussions he fears. You say you are his caregiver. Could he come to live with you? Or do you already live in this threesome?
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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Medical POA goes into effect when the patient can no longer make their own healthcare decisions.

Since Matthew CAN speak for himself, Michael has no right to go to the Dr's unless Matt wants him there. And he doesn't.

Does Matthew have access to a My Chart with his drs? If so, and he is reluctant to step up in front of Michael and he wants the drs to know this, he can communicate to them through the My Chart. Then when he goes in for an appt, Michael will not be allowed to go in.

Can YOU step up be his advocate in changing MPOA? He's going to have to do this legally, although one would think that just talking to the person involved and asking him to step back would be enough.

Has Michael ALWAYS been the boss of Matthew? Some people really take the POA thing way too far, too soon.

I'm my Dh's MPOA and when he has had health issues, I often would go with him and simply take notes and not talk. Sometimes the doc would look over at me for a nod of the head or something to concur with what DH was saying. As long as DH was able to make his own decisions, he did. Unless ASKED for my opinion, I was simply a note taker.

Sounds like you may have a little fight go on....good luck with this. Other posters will chime in with better, more in depth answers.

BTW--FWIW, I am my DH's POA in all matters. My oldest daughter is mine. I know DH cannot handle anything re: my health. My daughter can.
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Reply to Midkid58
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