I am so unhappy. Lost son, how can I get help to make me want to keep living.

Dear flower, I'm so sorry for your loss. May I ask if your son's dad is still alive? (Cuz he would know the depth of your sorrow too, & maybe that cud help get u thru). If not, did your son have a wife or children? Whoever loved your son would also share your grief & it cud console u to lean on them. Otherwise, I know that grief support groups have specific meetings just for parents like urself. (Meeting others affected by same loss would certainly help). My mother lost my younger sister, when she was in her 30's. Mother never spoke of it to me, & I don't know how she managed her grief. Feel free to send a message to me if you need to talk further.

as a last resort -- thrive just to spite your enemies . ( perceived or real ) .
it works for me .

Sorry for your loss. Please get some help. If your not sure where to start, reach out to your primary care doctor. If you have a psychiatric hospital in the area, check yourself in. There is no shame in needing help.



"If you can't run, you walk, and if you can't walk, you crawl, and if you can't do that... you find someone to carry you" (quote from Firefly ,but appropriate)

Longears,

You wrote "I could say "hang in there, it gets better" but it doesn't get better.
Hang in there: it gets DIFFERENT."

Perfectly said for any loss. I'm going to quote you to help others.

I want to share my poem to everyone who has lost loved ones

Heaven is just over there I know
Sometimes I wish I could visit or go
Life here on earth is so hard I know
But if I could just visit Heaven I'd go
Then come back to earth and share God's love
To the people who need it from God's eyes above

May God Bless each and everyone of us, Amen

Flower, I’m so very sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine your grief.

BUT please, reach out to someone or a group if you are at the end of your rope. THERE IS HELP through this season of your life.

Lifting you up in prayer today, along with my Aunt, who lost her only son.

I’m so sorry flower. Our children are supposed to bury us, not the other way around. It doesn’t seem natural. I will keep you in my prayers. Hugs!

Longears and Captain, you are in my prayers too. I would never even try to say that I know how it feels because I don’t. I have two daughters and I love them dearly. That part I know. I can’t imagine losing them though.

Again, I am so very sorry. I do believe a part of them is still with you. They live in your hearts and always will.

Flower1010, I am so very sorry for you & the loss of your son! My daughter just died in March. The first few months I didn't want to live. I DID NOT want to hurt myself! I just didn't care what happened to me. DH has dementia from traumatic brain injury. Our daughter's death is new to him every day and gone 2 minutes later. I try to cry in private. The shower is a really good place for me.

I could say "hang in there, it gets better" but it doesn't get better. Hang in there: it gets DIFFERENT.

It really & truly sucks that your son died! Your world really did end that day. You will not get "over" this. You will get THROUGH it. In your own time, at your own pace, the brutally sharp edges will become smoother, rounded.

You will be able to go down the cereal aisle & not cry when you see his favorite cereal. You will be able to bake your special cookies again. You will find yourself humming along with the radio again.

You are loved. You make a difference in the world around you. People you may not know care about you.

We were at our daughter's house for months. The neighbors paid our water bills. My first time back, the lady at the drive thru said she noticed I hadn't been through & hoped everything was okay. We had only shared comments on the weather or wishes for happy holidays, but she realized I wasn't there. I always feel invisible. But someone noticed when I was wasn't there. Amazing!

My heart is broken for you. I will grieve for you, one mom to another. Those who are on this site will have open arms, warm hearts & caring support for you! GOD bless & keep you in his holy care!!!

So sorry for the loss of your son and may God bring you comfort and your Angels in your time of loss.
Reach out to a support group and take baby steps like my cousin did to a tragic loss of his daughter a few years ago.
He was a pastor and now helps people in prison ministry.
Whatever you do don't give up and fight those feelings, as you are loved by many.
Call your doctor and she can help you also. xoxo

Amen to that Captain!

if you go take a walk thru a 19th century graveyard youll see a shocking number of infant to 30 ish year old grave markers . it tells me that tragic loss has always afflicted humans .
the survivors went on with life for the purpose of supporting other loved ones . my closest son was taken away by a senseless murder three years ago . theres no way in hell that you could be more alone than i am right now . i have to continue on because someday i might touch the life of someone i havent even met yet .

as easily as bad things could happen -- good things could happen too . past experience tells me to expect BOTH .

Flower so very sorry for your loss.
As Gershun said if you are feeling suicidal please get help stat. Life is worth living and even though heartaches and heartbreaks occur, they are only for a season and will pass. Please hang in there and DO NOT GIVE UP. A big hug to you.
I know when my Mom lost her oldest son, it broke her heart. So I have seen firsthand the pain you must feel. But please do not think that life is not worth living. You can do so much in honor and memory of your son.
I am sure that your son would not want you to feel like this, he would want you to continue living, for you have a purpose to fulfill.
What got my Mom through is her faith.
God heals and comforts. And I will be praying for you that you are comforted and that you call on our only help and only hope, Jesus.

flower1010, could you share a bit more.

You sound very desperate and we can all help you more if you share more details.

In the meantime, hang in there......don't give up. If you are feeling suicidal please get yourself some help right away. Phone a suicide hotline, call a friend. There is help out there.