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I can't be her DPOA/Trstee.


My Aunt is 95 and lives in her home. I have to give up the Financial POA and Trustee because there are 23 money hungry beneficiaries that will cause me problems, personal liability etc and they do not like me or talk to me.


I want to be her Healthcare POA and continue keeping her in her home but how can I pay the 2 people that help me and provide all her meals? Any special provisions?


Aunt is in great health (no meds, does laundry, takes bath, does NO cooking whatsoever) but cannot make logical or complex decisions. I pay her bills she thinks she pay them, because they appear on her bank statement. I let her think she is as independent as possible.

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I believe that unless you have Durable POA or Financial POA, you have no say over her finances. If you are signing her checks to pay her bills with her name, that’s forgery and you could be in big trouble with those beneficiaries. Also, unless it is a joint account between you and her, if you are spending her money without financial POA and it is proven that she was incompetent during this time, again, you could be in trouble. I would turn over the responsibility for her finances to whomever has financial POA or to one of those beneficiaries and let them worry about it. Draw up Caregiver Agreements for you and the people who help you and insist you are to be paid from her finances by whoever will have control of her finances.
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Mareva Sep 2019
I am currently DPOA. She is having her assets put into a Trust and I will not be Trustee son e there are over 20 beneficiaries that I would be accountable to and held liable. This would be a full time job just to answer everyone if they don’t agree with my decisions.

I want to continue to be her Healthcare POA and keep her in her home as she wants.

Everything is running very smoothly and she is very happy with her care. My concern is getting the caregiver, handyman and weekend/holiday meals paid since I will not be able to handle her finances unless there is some verbiage/special permission that would allow me to pay these bills.
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So much more clear. If she has not yet given over management of the accounts to you then she pays her own bills. If the DPOA is now made POA then you pay all the bills. The beneficiaries do not have a right to her private information. She appointed you the DPOA and hopefully will make you Trustee of the Trust if bills have to come out of that. Keep careful meticulous records and a diary every single day. They are gold in court, and these jackaninnies may just take you there if they are greedy. Are you also DPOA for health care? You have her best interests at heart.
As I said, one person should be in charge of the bills,the payments and etc. That will be YOU if you are the DPOA. You will have to go to all the banks, and etc. I am doing POA for my brother and Trustee of his Trust. It is not easy and his estate is VERY easy. I will warn you of that. This many beneficiaries is a nightmare esp if they are the grasping greedy one. I hope she spends up every single penny of that on herself. But they are going to be watching you every single second. For myself I could not have that be my life. I wish you so much luck. I would be CERTAIN that you have a GOOD elder law attorney. I would refer the others to that person and pay that person out of her estate. Let them know that every time they raise any kind of heck it is money out of their future pockets.
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Actually, as DPOA, you are not obligated to make her financial status known to anyone but any legal representatives such as attorneys or court personnel. You are not required to divulge anything to any of the beneficiaries. You have an obligation to keep her finances private. Her beneficiaries (do you mean heirs?) will not become so until she passes. Then, it will be the responsibility of an attorney to deal with them.
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You should not be paying any bills. You are not the POA. Who is the POA. That is the person who is to pay for her care out of her funds. Does the Aunt have her own checkbook? Is she writing checks? Who is writing the checks for the Aunt? Who is the POA for the Aunt?
If there is a greedy family here you need NOT to be paying any bills. They need to get one of them assigned as POA.
You said "I have to give up POA, because..........etc". DID you give it up? HOW did you give it up?
I am very confused about all this.
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Mareva Sep 2019
I am current DPOA. She is in the process of putting all her assets into a trust. Since there will be over 20 beneficiaries and they all provide oversight and accountability it would be a full time job for me since they may not agree with my decisions.

I only want look out for her and keep her at home which is what she wants. Others would be overbearing and make her move.

I have not taken any money or pay, I do this because I care.

Hope this makes things more clear.
Thank you for taking time to reply.
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Actually if there is a trust then the beneficiaries have certain rights. The type of trust and what type of beneficiary they are determines what their rights are. If the aunt is setting up an irrevocable trust then the beneficiaries will likely have a right to information about the trust and an accounting.
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My Aunt is her own Trustee, I will be appointed as her “Agent”, and when she passes, the Alternate Trustee will take over. I will be able to co tinue just as I am, being her Healthcare POA and pay her caregiver etc.
This solves the issue for me.
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