I have been working for my patient for the past seven years. She was always healthy until she broke an ankle and has been bed ridden ever since. I am to do everything working a seven week schedule sometimes with little to no sleep. My patient is very rude and strict and demands so much from me. I get paid hourly but have been working so many hours. I feel bad for charging overtime or even all the hours that I work.
Before COVID hit I used to have an agency that came in with caregivers that worked three days a week. She refuses anyone in her home now because she is scared we might get sick but won’t get vaccinated.
I do so much and I feel mentally, physically and spiritually drained.
Can anyone relate or hep me in what I should do?

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You feel drained because you are drained. You are in burnout. Please put up a boundary of 40 hrs a week immediately and no more, no matter what her beliefs are about Covid. She can hire a weekend caregiver who is vaccinated and then she shouldn't have to worry. There is no amount of money worth losing your health and well-being over. There is no solution if you persist in being the easy (and cheap) solution for her. Also, your state most likely considers you her full-time employee, which means she is bound by law to follow all employment obligations, like withholding your SS and Medicare contributions, allowing for time-off, overtime pay and a W2 at the end of the year. If you aren't getting this AND you are burning out, can you see what a terrible arrangement this is? You are not obligated to solve all her problems. You are not responsible for her happiness. Tell her you won't work over 40 hrs and that she MUST hire another person for the other hours. Of course she won't like it but that's for her to solve. I'm an employer and I'm advising you to put up this boundary or face further burnout.

Have you been hired by the patient or is someone acting as her PoA? Whoever hired you is your employer. This person can get into trouble with the IRS for not following the rules. You can get into financial trouble in your retirement years because she hasn't been complying with labor laws and withholding your taxes so that your SS will be piddly. I wish you much clarity and wisdom and peace in your heart that it is necessary to have this boundary for yourself.
Helpful Answer (4)
Reply to Geaton777

Personally, I would consider looking for another job. Give notice before leaving. You should not be mistreated by her. You have gone above and beyond for her.

She isn’t being reasonable. Covid is irrelevant, she’s using that as an excuse. She has the option to get vaccinated or have a vaccinated worker come into help her. She is expecting too much from you. You have earned your payment so do not feel guilty about it. What terms did you agree on concerning your payment?

You are drained. You need your rest in order to do a proper job and remain healthy. She is being selfish.

Tell her what you are willing to do and stick to it. Did she hire you or a family member? If you were hired by a family member, speak to them and tell them that this isn’t what you signed up for.

Best wishes to you.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to NeedHelpWithMom

Have you discussed this with the person paying you. Things are opening up they should be able to find additional help. You need to talk to the Labor board and find out what your rights as a "live in" are.
Its been discussed alot on this forum and this is what has been said

You are paid at least the minimum wage
If your state does not consider you self-employed, then taxes and SS should be taken out of your pay. And SS deduction matched by ur employer.
As any employee, you work 40hrs a week and any overtime, time and half. You must have the appropriate time off.
They can't deduct from your pay room and board. You can't be made to pay rent.
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to JoAnn29

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