I am a caregiver for my husband who has dementia and early Alzheimer’s. He has started habits that concern me. What do I do?

Alzheimers is incurable and advances rapidly. Many patients forget to swallow and spit the food. There is nothing you can do to bring him back to normal. Some patients deteriorate faster than others, not every case is the same. It's unfortunately, but Alzheimer's is not curable. There medicines out there that promise to help the memory, but in practice they are useless and have lots of side effects. You will have to consider placing your husband in a facility for dementia. Alzheimer's is practically a death sentence. The brain dies before than the rest of te body. Reality is harder than illusions.

Unfortunately, this disease is a progressive one and is not completely curable, and this disease can bring overwhelming responsibility to care for a dementia patient. Especially true since the disease is a progressive one. However, you can stay calm and make a proper plan to provide care to your husband, and you can stay alert and provide the best possible care he deserves. One of the other alternatives is hiring an In-home caregiver to have the best dementia care plan with the possible flexibility. It can be instrumental in handling the daily tasks of caregiving, and it can be changed and updated as and when needed with the progression of the disease.

Sadly, things will not improve, they will just continue to decline. It is the bitter reality of dementia. Swallowing issues are common and there has been good advice here to address that. The best thing you can do is learn all you can through this forum, Teepa Snow videos and resources available through the Alzheimers Association. When my Dad developed dementia my Mom was so terrified by it she was unable to learn anything. She practiced "if I ignore it, then it will go away". Ultimately that made things much more difficult for her, but I can accept that some people just cannot face the dementia reality.
Knowledge is power. The book The 36 Hour Day is set up a bit like that old standby Dr. Spock for child raising. You can look up a topic and get all sorts of helpful info.
And don't forget to be kind to yourself. Arrange to have a day each week for you to get away and rewind. It could be read a good book at the library, lunch with friends, a walk in the woods, visit a myseum...anything. it will be a priceless gift to yourself to recharge.
Best of luck in these trying times.

He may be giving up and wanting to dye. Ask Him. Ask a Chaplain for help if he is anxious. God gives peace.

Smithpath: Imho, I suggest that you read the book, "The 36 Hour Day."

Many things you husband is going to do from now on will be "uncommon to him and certainly disturbing to you! Learn all you can from resources like The Alzheimer's Association about Coping Strategies for difficult behaviors. You can access AA online or by telephone. If there is a support group for caregivers in your area and if you are able to attend, you might get some coping ideas from others who have had your same problems much like you may get from this forum.

Take advantage of any ways you can learn and gain some "How To" ideas. Deal with each behavior as it shows up. There is no one right way to solve each problem. Maybe you will be the one to figure out techniques that will help others.

As bizarre as some of your husband's behaviors may seem, they come from his declining ability to interact with the world in the way you are both used to. Be as open minded and creative as you can be.

See if he can have liquid meds or crushable medications. Mix with with pudding, apple sauce, or other similar food. Make sure he swallows them all and check the inside of his cheeks for "pouching". In that case, make sure he takes a lot of sips of fluids between bites so he swallows.

Might I suggest that he may benefit from a swallowing evaluation - a referral can be made by his doctor. A certified physical therapist will have him swallow food and fluids of different consistencies as well as evaluate his swallowing. The therapist can then give you recommendations on how to adjust his food so it is easily swallowed and any movement problems that must be addressed.

Educating yourself is one of the best things you can do for both of you. Reaching out here is a good start.
And you need to have a break. Try to find someone that can sit with him for one afternoon a week. A few hours will do wonders, it helps your mental health and makes you a better caregiver in the long run.

I wish you peace and love on your journey.

Does he exhibit choking when he eats?   If so, he might be having difficult swallowing.  A videoscopic swallow test performed by a qualified speech pathologist could determine whether that's an issue.

It isn't possible for us to diagnose this w/o a qualified medical person, but that might be why he's spitting out food and medicine.

As far as the medications go...pick your battle on that. If there are meds that he really does not need look into discontinuing them. Do not just stop them as some need to be "titrated" down in order to safely go off the medication.
Others ask the doctor or pharmacy if they come in another form. Patches, liquid and suppository are all common ways to administer meds.
The spitting. I had that happen often. Sometimes I thought it was a texture thing there were other times when I think my Husband just didn't know how to swallow and instead of going down it would go out. Then the next mouthful would be fine.
(with dementia sometimes it is anyones guess as to what is going on)

I would suggest watching some videos on YouTube from Teepa Snow,(about this issue and more) and also reading the book The 36 Hour Day, as it will be in your best interest now to educate yourself as much as possible, as things will only continue to change and get worse, and having the knowledge will help you better cope.
Also finding a local caregiver support group can be very helpful as well. You can Google to see if there is one in your area. That's how I found the one that I have been apart of for the last 3 1/2 years, and it literally saved my life when I was caring for my husband. Being able to share with others that are going through the same or similar things as you, is life changing for sure. Most of course are still meeting on Zoom, but that is better than nothing.
Make sure that you're taking care of yourself as well, as you're just as important as he is. And if that means hiring someone to come in to stay with him a few days so you can get out and about, please do that.
And as far as him spitting out his medications, perhaps ask his Dr. if any of them come in liquid form that you can put in his drinks, or if any of them can be crushed and put in his liquids, as he may be having some swallowing issues, which can be a common issue with someone with Alzheimer's/dementia as the brain forgets how to tell the throat to close causing the food/liquids to go into the lungs instead of the stomach, and that can cause aspiration pneumonia.
It's a lot, I know. So the best thing you can do for yourself at this point, is educate yourself, so you feel better prepared when the changes come, and guaranteed they will.
I wish you strength and peace for your journey.