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My husband, post stroke with vascular dementia, has been in long term care, dementia unit, for 4 months. The facility is top notch with very caring staff. Husband is difficult to manage at times and very insistent that he wants to go home. There is no way I could handle him at home emotionally or physically, even with help as he gets verbally/emotionally abusive and can be a danger to himself as he thinks he’s more physically capable than he is. He’s fallen multiple times because he ignores the staffs instruction to ask for assistance. I have POA, but the Social Worker, at the facility, states that since he continues to want to go home, and Medicaid is pending, that I may have to seek Conservatorship to legally hold him there. Is this true? Isn’t POA enough? He is not safe to come home. If he came home, I would leave. That’s how much it scares me. We are both 72.

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Ask for him to be evaluated for anxiety and depression. If he’s obsessing about going home, meds might help.
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Hi gladimhere, I checked the Health Care Instructions and it says “if my attending physician determines that I am unable to understand and appreciate the nature and consequences of healthcare decisions and unable to reach and communicate and informed decision regarding treatment, my healthcare agent and attorney in fact for healthcare decisions is authorized to:” and then it goes on to list 9 different scenarios.
Further along in the document it designates me as conservator if one needs to be appointed.

I will make sure the institute has read these thoroughly.
Thank you about the “ The emergency conservator and/or guardianship”
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Carole, how does the POA read? Does it require that he be declared incapacitated by two doctors prior to it going into effect? Or is it a standing POA, in effect always. If hubby is not incompetent then he has the right to make his own decions, no matter how bad they are.

The nursing home or you can file for emergency guardianship and conservatorship but if he is competent you will not be successful.
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Conservatorship is set up to handle finances. Guardianship can do more than POA. I think a POA is enough. He no longer can make decisions. Stand by your guns and say no .
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Hopefully the doc will agree. Many do not want to be placed in that position. Best wishes.
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Carole515, kudos to you for taking care of your new husband. Sounds like your health care POA will probably be sufficient if and when his doctor determines that he is incompetent. But because you used the word "conservatorship" rather than "guardianship," I'm wondering which word the social worker actually used when she talked to you. If it really was "conservatorship" and you don't have his financial POA, then it is possible that you will have to go through the court to become his conservator and, if so, you might as well become his guardian as well, since it would probably cost no more to include that and because, as JoAnn29 mentioned, guardians have more authority than POA agents. If your husband's children are not in agreement with your decisions, everything could become more complicated, especially if you are not both his guardian and conservator. Good luck to you on your unexpected journey.
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There are medications that help keep people like your husband be calm and easier to work with. A geriatric doctor should know these things and provide answers for you. The facility where he is should know this as well, so why aren't they doing something about this or offering suggestions? If they don't know, maybe they shouldn't be in the business. I would ask them about this and expect clear answers and better alternatives than you have been provided. Trained and attentive staffing is the better answer than home. It would be impossible for you to be able to do this. I hope you are in an area with more choices than this one place. Not having enough money complicates matters.
Medicaid pending is a turn-off for some places. Good luck on finding good alternatives!
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Hi bicycler, thank you for your input. The social worker actually used the term "conservatorship" and then explained that it would cover more than POA and the health care directive that does name me and also states that I should be appointed 'conservator' if one is needed. I will ask the social worker about becoming his guardian. Thank goodness, my husband's children are very supportive of my decisions and are appreciative of all that I do. They realize if I hadn't come along they would be dealing with all of this. It's all so very draining..... but so far less than when I was his caregiver at home. I have gained a new appreciation for all the caregivers out there. Bless their hearts.
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