Husband with dementia had pneumonia and sepsis, ended up in the hospital, and now his dementia is worse! Will it improve?

When those with dementia move it makes them unsure where anything is - going to the hospital was a move as far as he is concerned then he had another move when he came home so he is trying to re-establish everything & I hope for both your sakes he reverts back but it is not guaranteed to happen

My 80yo father has never been Dx’d with a dementia, but he does have ongoing cognitive problems, is easily and often confused about facts, has memory issues, etc., maybe stemming from a TBI in the 1960s.

He was gravely ill with sepsis and kidney/bladder failure/infection in Fall 2014 and was recovering for some time after. He was frail and more disoriented than before. I’m not sure he’s ever recovered to the more spry guy he was when I first started caregiving to his mother in 2011, but he was able to come back some from being very ill and is at a stable place and a new normal for him, now 4.5 years later. I think his quality of life is as good as could be expected and he seems content.

I’m not a medical pro in the least, but I think what you want to aim for with your hubs is his new normal, whatever that is going to be for him. Dementia and aging are both a one way street. Having realistic expectations may help you to understand when he is recovered as much as he can be, and you can take comfort in that. Give it a couple months of recovery to see how his behavior and cognitive abilities improve.

thank you all for suggestions. He is doing better, but today he asked about voting. I told him that would be 2020...He wanted to go the the library to check out what I said. You know what really bothers me, it is because I am basically alone. He was 172 lbs. now about 140, skin and bones, I have to cajole him to eat. I give him vitamins and anything to get him to eat. His ostomy he refused to ever do. Doctor said 10 years ago he needed to learn. He did not . It is on me. He was a vibriant guy who was fun to be around,we travelled, lived a great life. He had a high powered job disbarring lawyers in New York. Now he is reduced to looking forward to a bagel at Panera. It is breaking my heart. who is he? I care for him, but I cant figure things out in my head. He really is gone and has been for a long time. I take him to our clubhouse for all ativities. We are in a small 55 plus community so if he doesnt want to stay its minutes from the house. I miss my husband And I grieve everyday. What a lousy end for him and me. I am getting help in a couple of days a week. It is not that far gone for daycare. He would not like that. He has sound days...and remembers some things. But his spirit is gone he is childlike. I feed him and dress him and take him out just like I did my children. This is breaking everyone hearts, the kids, grandkids, seeing him brings tears to their eyes everydime. He talks gibberish sometimes making no sense, and they nod their heads in agreement. I am just worn out..he has been sick 15 years with all the heart attacks, open heart surgery and the cancer surgery. Our golden years............

joycee1...."they" all say they do not like Day Care but...once they get there and get involved it is different. The will say the next day they don't like it but again...once they get involved it changes. Sort of like a kid going to school, they don't want to get on the bus but once they get to school things are alright.
So if there is an Adult Day Care that he can attend I think that would do you both a world of good.
I missed my Husband for years before he died. But every once in a while something would happen that would make me laugh, in turn he would laugh and I would get a glimpse of what once was. It was bitter-sweet those moments. You sometimes have to look for those times.
Is your husband on Hospice, or have you checked to see if he would be eligible for Hospice? You would get a lot of help from them, 2 or more times a week you would have a CNA that would come in and help bathe him, order supplies, a Nurse would come to check him medically, you would have a Social Worker that can help as well. A variety of therapists from music, art, massage and for you a volunteer that would come in and give you a break once in a while, or as often as once a week.
((Hugs)) and hang in there.

I am sure my situation is all too familiar. My husband is 82 so I have to face the fact of what this is. I try and make him comfortable and take him out when I can. I called Elder care to see if I can get a compainion to do things with him, as he does still have good days. Can not afford nursing home. I would go broke. So I have to make this work. He was so sick this time, I really didnt think he'd come home. Some people were great and understanding. Others who are "friends" not a call not a card not a meal the whole time he was in hospital. You learn a lot in cifficult times. But I choose not to dwell on that stuff. It is just so overpowering to take care of every detail of our lives. He used to do bills. Now I do that take care of him house and whatever needs to be done. I dont know how long this phase will last but I see that it is draining to me. I dont complain much because really dont want to hear you. Everybody has a turn at life, the best of my life is gone and I have to find a new normal. Hope I see a ray of sunshine at some point. But as for now I grieve...