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She is a very good gardener and a good & nice person. He has accused her of stealing keys, shears and the latest is a hammer. Told my neighbour that he might hit me over the head with it.

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Get your husband to a neurologist to have him checked for dementia, his bloodwork and a checkup. These are all symptoms of someone having a difficult time making brain connections and making accurate decisions. Do it before he does hit you with a hammer.
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Fannyann, just thinking outside of the box here.... wonder if your hubby resents that someone else is now doing the yard work which he use to do on a regular basis. Maybe he's angry at himself.

If it is possible, have your gardener ask your hubby what he thinks about this or that in respect to the landscaping.

At one time I use to do all my own landscaping, then eventually got someone to mow.... in fact, at this very moment I have landscapers cleaning up my backyard which had fallen into disrepair, a crazy natural habitat gone wild, and what a great job they are doing... I go out and chat a few minutes with the guys asking what do they think, suggestions, ideas, etc. How I wish I could be doing the work, but that ship sailed 6 years ago when I became my parent's driver, I don't have the free time nor the energy :(
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First, keep your eyes and ears open in case there may be some basis for his negative reaction to the gardener. Second, have him checked out by his doctor, possibly evaluated for medication. Blessings for a positive outcome.
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I agree with the suggestion of putting the maligned person in a "good light". I caretake my aunt & uncle who have Alzheimer's and dementia. The aunt says bad things about me all the time. It also helps that the people who get told these things do not believe them or even pretend to the person saying them that they believe it. The mind is a fertile ground for those suffering with the disease. They tend to dwell on the negative and certainly do not need any encouragement of negativity.
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Hi - at some level, I'd let let her know he's feeling animosity and it's completely unreasonable you know, but let her be aware to keep her distance. My mother says stuff like that to others, too, assassinating politicians etc. :0 so hopefully this neighbor understands the overall psychology. Good idea about trying to paint her rosy to him. If she has access to the house (sounds like it) see if you can't reduce that access. He's evidently got a lot of time on his hands, and people will use their imaginations when bored. Surely it would be great to get him into some hobby or pursuit if you can. Good luck.
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If your husband is talking about hurting you, I would remove all tools or weapons from his control. Is there a medical reason for this? Does he have dementia? You might discuss it with his doctor.

If it's dementia, my experience has been that it sometimes works if I suggest that the disliked person has positive things to say about the person with dementia. I may say, Oh, they had nice things to say about you or they mentioned that you were a nice lady or a good singer. I try to put them in a good light with lots of positive things. Sometimes it makes a difference and sometimes it doesn't. I have found that if it's dementia, sometimes the dislike will go away on it's on with the patient having no memory that they every had the dislike.
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