I'm at my wits end and I don't know what to do. My MIL is getting worse. For the last 10 years, my husband and I were basically left to take care of his mother because his sister refused to (it's all about money). Now that she has dementia, my husbands bitterness is at it's all time high. He has admitted that he is NOT CAPABLE of taking care of her. Nobody will help him. Neither of his siblings think there's any dire need for in-home care, or to get their mother in a long-term care facility. My husband (and I) cannot do it.
But the YELLING....ohhhh the yelling he does at her. It gets me so angry. I resent the woman, she's not my favorite person in the world (before she had dementia she was mean and miserable, and she's even more mean and miserable now), but I would NEVER EVER want to see her feeling or being neglected. My husband yells at her "leave me alone" - "go away". She has become EXTREMELY CLINGY. Even worse now than years ago. It's to the point we can't even leave the house.
I am not exaggerating. It's gotten THAT bad. When I talk to him about it he doesn't want to talk about it.
Yet, I told him that he's no different than his sister because he treats his mother like garbage when he yells at her.
He's got to get a grip. I just don't know how to help him. He won't stop. When I'm at work, Lord knows what he says to her or how much he yells at her. My anxiety is at an all time high and I can barely breathe.
I don't know what to do or say. Nobody will help us. His siblings say they have an action plan, but nobody has lifted a finger.