At the beginning of February, my husband was admitted to a rehab facility for 3 months of physical therapy for mobility issues. He will be returning home this coming Saturday. I've been "on my own" for this time and doing pretty well. I've handled any issues with the house, paid bills, budgeted our expenses and carried on with life. When he returns, I am concerned that things will go back to him as master and me as slave and I am becoming very depressed about this. Previously, I couldn't even get up out of a chair without him asking what I was going to do. If he was just trying to make conversation, it got to be extremely annoying. He obsesses over many things and needs to have the final say in whatever is done or not done. He is immobile and as they've said in rehab, even after 4 months of therapy, he remains " max assist" , only able to feed himself. My family room will be turned into a hospital room with a bed and lift and caregiving supplies. If we qualified for Medicaid, I would have him remain at this facility despite his protests. He cannot get into or out of a car. We have free paratransport here, but that can only take him around our city. I cannot take him anywear. Our life is far from how the Senior citizens live in the AARP and Consumer Cellular ads.
I love my husband. He has a cardiac issues. So did his twin brother. I live in fear that he will pass as his brother did, suddenly, in the middle of the night. Because of this, I feel very obligated to do all he asks and tolerate his "type A" personality. I'm not sure I will now be able to be a "little churchmouse" anymore. I sincerely do not want to be nasty or insulting to him, but he pushes me there. I never get the feeling he cares about me beyond my taking care of him. He seldom says please or thank you, and often, even though he has power of speech, he will on occasion point and grunt when he wants something.
I am trying very hard to graciously accept this hand I've been dealt but he makes it very difficult.