Follow
Share

They don’t have any children and wife is ill. We are the closest living relatives. We don’t know anything about their finances and he doesn’t “meet the criteria” for hospice. How do we begin to plan!!?

I'd like to know how a 95 year old with stage 4 cancer can not be eligible for hospice 😠, IMO there is no way that is correct, something got lost or misunderstood somewhere along the way - I think your first priority should be to get that corrected.
Helpful Answer (17)
Reply to cwillie
Report

95 and stage 4 (as bad as it gets) pancreatic and he doesn't meet criteria for hospice? That makes utterly ZERO sense, and am wondering who told you that. That is unimaginable.
It is very likely he will be able to go home with an ailing wife. If he makes it out of the hospital (he may not) then he will require placement. With the lack of children and a wife who cannot function social services may well go for guardianship; that may be a very good thing, indeed. I would not attempt to intervene in any of this except to visit if you are nearby.
I caution you not to do the POA thing on a couple you do not really know much about at all or have contact with unless you are experienced and capable. I am currently doing this for my brother who has a simple life, simple estate, simple everything and IT IS NOT IN THE SLIGHTEST SIMPLE.
Courts can appoint Fiduciaries in cases like this who function very very well. Social Services will be well aware by now that there is no family involved. If the wife lives close to you you may want to be a support to her in future; her husband has a very short time left to live.
Helpful Answer (11)
Reply to AlvaDeer
Report
Jayrn59 Sep 17, 2019
My husband is pretty distraught with the news about his uncle I will ask him again. Is it possible that without financial information they could refuse hospice?
(3)
Report
See 1 more reply
My 62 yo SIL died within 6 weeks of her stage 4 Pancreatic Cancer diagnosis.

Who told you (or told your husband) that uncle is not eligible for hospice? Maybe he's not eligible for REHAB, which would be a whole different kettle of fish.

Someone needs to talk to the discharge planning folks at the hospital. Note that hospice does not cover 24/7 care; if he goes home, someone needs to be with him all the time.

Best case scenario, IMO is that he gets discharged, private pay, to a NH if he's not eligible for Medicaid. And Hospice gets brought in to manage his care there.
Helpful Answer (9)
Reply to BarbBrooklyn
Report

Health POA is not financial POA. Hubby just needs to follow the wishes and make decisions on accepting or rejecting medical intervention.

I did POA and executor for my brother 3 weeks before his death 7 months ago. His friends and I pushed him to get a lawyer emergently. He did not have a wife or children. I have experience but his was more complex, still needing probate and legal advice. It is still not done and took a lot of work for the first 4 months. I was savvy enough to withdraw online about 30,000 locating his passwords on an account we shared. It was well needed to initially pay off the funeral and pay off bills till his house was sold. Yes bills can be delayed, plus I would not have been responsible for his debts. The fact is that a POA ends on death and then the executor takes over. So both docs need to be done.
Helpful Answer (9)
Reply to MACinCT
Report

Being Financial POA does not make one responsible for bills. One must be careful not to sign as oneself but only as POA for the person involved. Can uncle still physically sign documents? If so, he should sign them himself.

Hospice is a Medicare-paid benefit; not having all their financial information shouldn't be a bar to getting hospice. It WOULD be a deterrent to getting him admitted into a hospice facility or nursing home, because unless he has Medicaid, he would be admitted as a private pay patient.
Helpful Answer (8)
Reply to BarbBrooklyn
Report
Isthisrealyreal Sep 17, 2019
Or long term care insurance.
(3)
Report
See 2 more replies
I would call the hospice providers in his area.

I can't fathom that he doesn't qualify for hospice.

Get someone to explain what the problem is, did a sloppy doctor code something wrong? What needs to happen to get this man care?

I am very sorry that your family is going through this difficult time.
May God grant you strength and wisdom to deal with this situation. Hugs!
Helpful Answer (8)
Reply to Isthisrealyreal
Report

WTH?? Stage 4 pancreatic cancer and he doesnt meet the criteria?!?! Thats not true....his oncologist can set up a referral to hospice...i used to work in oncology and i lived through this myself, as my husband was diagnosed with same.....he lived less than 3 months after his diagnosis and we had hospice.....they helped tremendously. Is anyone assigned as POA for health and financials? If so, that person should be talking to drs and get this straightened out pronto.....so sorry.....
Helpful Answer (8)
Reply to cherokeegrrl54
Report

Try other hospice providers. If this person doesn’t meet criteria, I don’t know who would. Realize pancreatic cancer will eventually cause his demise and most likely within 6 months.
Helpful Answer (8)
Reply to Shane1124
Report

Something is not right. If his uncle has Medicare, his uncle should qualify for hospice with a diagnosis of stage 4 cancer.

Now that your husband has POA, have him sign a DNR/DNI so that, if his uncle does arrest, they will not resuscitate him, which is a shockingly violent act and, on a 95 year old, likely to break bones, cause organ damage, and land him on a ventilator where he will die from pneumonia in a matter of weeks. And all those days or week of treatment in an ICU bring in big $$$money$$$ for the hospital.

Help your husband advocate for his uncle to be put on comfort measures with hospice so that he gets a good death.
Helpful Answer (8)
Reply to NYDaughterInLaw
Report
Grandma1954 Sep 20, 2019
Medicare or not If he is seeking treatment for the cancer he is not eligible for Hospice. He would be eligible for Palliative that would lead into Hospice if he chose to
(6)
Report
See 1 more reply
Don’t take no for an answer regarding hospice.

Also, make it very clear in every conversation with everyone that there is no one to care for him in his current living situation.

He needs in patient hospice snd that’s how he’ll get it.

If anyone shows any sign of being willing to take him home, the hospital will stop right there and that will NOT be the best care for him.
Helpful Answer (7)
Reply to IsntEasy
Report

See All Answers

Ask a Question

Subscribe to
Our Newsletter