Together for 30 years. Married for 28. Has always had pain, although in the early years it wasn't super bad. For about the past 12 to 13 years, he has had multiple surgeries, and now, has not worked for 11 years. He injured his back and almost tore off his leg at the knee while in the military, before I met him. Although he walks, he many times takes wheelchairs places we go. His pain level ranges between six and nine constantly. He rarely sleeps past about two hours a night. She say the least he is a very grumpy man. I still work full-time, but but honestly, retirement doesn't look good anymore. The idea of being home with him 24/7, makes me cringe. There is no more and intimacy between us. We argue constantly. He can be verbally abusive, and can make me feel inadequate often. I also believe that I may no longer really care about his pain. This concerns me about myself & just makes me sad. Our life together is not, at all, the way we thought & planned. As he is so mean spirited, we have no friends. I have friends, he does not, at all. He offends them & basically runs them off. His family barely speaks to him, including our only son. My friends & family are worried about me, and have been for several years. My full time job is very stressful, Social Services. I'm a mess at 56 years old.