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For example to church where we've been attending for 50+ Last week we went out to a grocery store, and coming back he said he would never be able to figure out how to get home. He just wants to stay home and sit on the porch. Is he having fears about getting back home when he is out? Am wondering about other folks experience with this? I don't know whether to press him about going out?

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mopsygirl, bring this to the attention of your hubby's primary doctor.... maybe a prescription med that can take the edge off might help for awhile.

There is a calming feeling about being home, and that I can understand. Home becomes one's cocoon :) It could be your hubby doesn't feel comfortable in crowds, like at church or in the grocery store.

There are many 55+ communities all around the States. Now would be a good time to move while hubby can still learn his way around and make new friends at the complex. If your home has stairs, that will eventually become a problem. My Dad had to move from his home into an one level apartment as he was a major fall risk with his early dementia.
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Mopsygirl, I imagine it would be frightening and disorienting to go out to places and to see people that should be familiar but are not, and it can be extremely tiring to keep up the pretense that everything is fine. I think now is a good time for the two of you to sit down and have a serious discussion about your future. As his mental and physical health decline he may become a different man from the one you knew all of these years and you need to have supports in place to handle that. Is it time to move to a home where more services are available? If not, when will that point come? Do you both have your legal affairs in order... poa's for health and finance, living wills and your last will and testament? What kind of home care is available in your area, what can you afford and how will you go about accessing it? It could be that he will be relieved to lay it all out in the open and be reassured when you have a plan in place. You might also want to mention any little problems you are having to your health care team. There may be counselling available to him through the Alzheimer's society, my Uncle with MCI went to classes to learn coping skills for his failing memory. In the meantime try to reassure him that you will keep him safe when you go out together, keeping a social outlet is important.
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