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But anything I suggest he finds fault with. If I go ahead and do it, or make arrangements for someone else to do it, he gets upset. Help!

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Alexander4, with dementia in the picture I'm afraid this is your new normal. It is not how you pictured your retirement years, and it certainly is not what your husband pictured. But it is what you have to deal with. I'm so sorry for you both.

My husband wanted to continue to do things he could no longer do safely. It helped some to remind him "you are retired from putting up curtain rods, and so am I! I'll get a handy man to do it. Meanwhile, let's you and I do something fun." My husband did understand that he had dementia and sometimes I would remind him that that was the reason he couldn't do something. But generally the idea of being "retired" was a little less discouraging.
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blannie, thank you!
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If he has Alzheimers (which your profile says he does), you're expecting too much of him. His brain is broken. Expecting him to come up with chores is not going to be beneficial to either of you. You need to start watching the Teepa Snow videos on Youtube. She has a bunch of short videos on dementia. One thing she talks about is how with dementia, people lose initiative. It's just a part of their brain. They can't help it. Your husband can't help it. Here's a video of hers on the ways to recognize dementia:

youtube/watch?v=pqmqC-702Yg

You can also start reading the threads on this site about Alzheimers and how to deal with someone who has it.
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cmagnum, he is on Aricept for Alzheimer's. No anti-depressant.
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sunflo2, yes, he has always been that way to a certain extent, but now it is worse, since he has Alzheimer's. I keep hearing that we shouldn't argue with the patient and upset him, but is this realistic?
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This isn't nuch info. This is common with many retirees or elders where they lose the will, or their stubbornness becomes more pronounced and they are obstinate about everything.

Have a frank conversation. This is a marriage and therefore a partnership. If he chooses not to participate, he can't stop you from taking measures to make house or whatever livable or investing in keeping the house up. Also, you need to foster your own relationships with friends, families, community --if he chooses not to, that's his choice, but make it clear you will continue to live and do and take vacations etc with or without him.

If he gets mad, ask "well, Jim, what would you want me to do if you weren't around anymore? Do you want me to be alone, no friends, no family, a house I can't take care of or that's falling apart because you won't let anyone come in and fix anything?"

"Sorry Jim, we may be retired but we still have phase 2 life to live, and by God, I intend to live it to the fullest....I deserve this!"
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What meds is he on? Is he taking anything for depression?
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