What should I do if my husband suddenly became very aggressive, pushed me, tried to kill me?

Nadin, if he is being aggressive, call 911 and have him taken to the ER. Check to see which hospitals in your area have a geriatric psych department and ask them to refer him for evaluation. They may be able to find medications that can calm him.

At the very least, talk to his doctor about the aggressive behavior. Whatever you do, don't put yourself in harm's way. Get to safety and call 911 if you are being threatened. It is the disease that is making him behave this way, but the things that he does can hurt you regardless of the reason. If they find the right medications, it will make life easier for both you and him. Please let us know what is happening with you.

Nadin, I'm sorry this has happened to you. This is a question of personal safety---yours. To me, your husband has crossed a line that means he should not be in the home alone with you. I'm sorry to say this to you, but your safety is threatened. Who will care for him if you're injured and hospitalized or in bed due to injuries? He needs to be in supervised care where there is staff with the ability to control his aggressive behaviors and keep him & others safe.

His Dr. needs to know about this because there might be a medication to calm this behavior. I wouldn't trust a medicine to enable you to keep him safely at home unless the Dr. can guarantee it will work...which is a huge guarantee that is questionable. This problem is due to the disease of dementia and isn't your husband's fault. Please don't keep yourself in harm's way. If your husband were well he would never want you to allow him to hurt you. Take care.

Nadin, has he always been aggressive and abusive? If so, it is going to continue to get worse. If not, and this is a rather sudden change he may have a urinary tract infection, or other sort of infection that may be causing the behavior.

Do call 911, not from home, from a safe place, a neighbor, perhaps. I would ask his doc to admit him for a geriatric psychiatric assessment. Those assessments are normally three days to try to regulate behavior by working with meds. Sometimes they can take longer than three days.

I agree with those above. I would immediately get him places somewhere that they can provide him the care and security he needs. Medication is often helpful, but it could take months to find out what works and adjusted. During that time, you are in danger. He should be in a place that can control him and prevent him from harming himself or others.

... or the police may take him to the hospital themselves.

I absolutely agree with both posts above. Call 911. A few times is a few too many. If you do not give him the intervention he needs, you are hurting him and yourself. Think if this was a situation that happened to a good friend, what would you advise her? Now be a friend to yourself and follow your own advice. I will be praying for you. Please do not wait for it to happen again. Call his doctor and advise the staff that you need an emergency appointment and why.

Stay safe. And that is VERY easy to say.

I'm betting this isn't unusual behavior for Alzheimer's patients. My sister-in-law attacked her husband a number of times. Th worst I personally witnessed was her coming up behind him with a pot and attempting to hit her over the head with it. THAT was when the family realized the seriousness of Dan's predicament.

Call his doctor today. Describe to him what happened and ask if there is medicine that can handle this unintentional but dangerous aggression. That's first up. Next, if you haven't already spoken to an elder law attorney, find one and make an appointment if you have any assets to protect. This so that you can plan for his placement in a nursing home.

You simply must act immediately. Until and unless something changes, you cannot trust your husband. The next time something like that happens might be at 3 AM in the morning when you're asleep.

I think all the above information is spot on, and I do hope you were able to get help and to a safe place for the both of you. Keep comming back, as you can see, the people here really care about one another, and always have the cargivers best interest at heart! Thank you to everyone!

I didn't mention that you may need to get the police involved in order to get him to the hospital. Don't be afraid or ashamed to do this. Let the person at 911 know what is going on. It would probably be best to get the police to help and then to call in the ambulance.