I've been living with my mother for almost 7 years now. She turns 90 in November. She is still able to do many things, but spends her days in her pajamas in front of the TV. She will get up to get herself something to eat, then throw her trash on the tables and floor for the slave daughter to pick up. If I say something to her, she'll say I can pick it up, because what else do I have to do, anyway. She leaves cabinets and drawers open. She throws clothes and towels on the floor. She will help clean the house some if my brothers come to visit.
Okay... I know there are people who are saying that she is 90 and out of energy. But truth is she has always been lazy. I mean lazy lazy. Her laziness has been the biggest problem in caring for her, because it makes me feel angry and contemptuous. If she couldn't do more, it would be one thing. I try the "Use it or lose it" idea, but the words have no impact. She just wants to sit and watch TV and eat. Drives me absolutely crazy. Sometimes I want to kick her butt and tell her to get up and start living. She is nowhere near death, so this could go on for years.