How to stop phone in DO NOTHING siblings from from stirring the pot?

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My mother lives with me and my hubby ( rent free, meals included, so she can save her money, shes on a long waiting list for an apartment ). Well apparently she likes to talk crap about me and her free living conditions to a sister who hasn't lifted a single finger to help her since my dad died. this sister likes to hear what I don't do for mom instead of EVERYTHING I actually do do for her. THIS particular sister likes to start crap and act like she knows whats best for our mother even though she hasn't lifted a darn finger to do a single darn thing for our mother. Fact is she LOVES mom being so far away so she dosent REALLLY have to lift a finger to help, just likes to tell everyone else what SHOULD be done. Other than just dropping mom off on her( sister ) doorstep
( so she can do it better ) any Ideas on how to keep do nothing siblings from interfering?? This daughter hasn't even seen this mother she cares so much about in MORE THAN A YEAR, yet she wants to interfere and tell people what should be done ?? I have already blocked this sister from MY life so she trys to get to me through other family members. If this sister thinks she can do so much better why dosent she step up to the plate ??? I'll tell you why because shes nothng but a WALKING EXCUSE. . Its wonderful to know after everything me and my hubby have done for my mom in the last year and a half that she talks crap about us behind our backs. How disgusting is THAT ?? I'm at my whit's end with this situation. I sure have learned the HARD TRUTH about my family in the last year and a half, and it isn't pretty !!!!!!! The only thing that keeps me going is knowing there is ( supposed to be ) a light at the end of the tunnel ( my mom having her own place where she can talk crap about me ALL she wants)

COPY-PASTE-SAVE CVSMich

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Deborah, do not do that. I know you are grasping on how to solve this problem right now. But, like me, I thought about running. Talk about looking guilty! So, as much as my twisted sisters wanted me out of the picture, and I was tempted to do it, nothing would have looked worse to APS than if I had run. Then have a warrant out for me for kidnapping my Mom. No, do not do that! Relax, cooperate, everything will be fine.
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katiekay... Right?!
Now, they have filed a complaint with Adult Protective Services and I have to jump through all those hoops! They are going to interview my mom at the adult day care place I have her in while I work and then come and do a house check of my place next week. As if I don't have enough to do! I am so DONE with all of them. I'm going to get an RV and move all over the country so they can never find me...
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My mother picks on (plain mean) to my 24 yr daughter... I think Mom is jealous of her.. Since she moved back home from college my Mom doesn't like that she converses with me... Mom would never say anything about my husband because she considers him "head of household, bread winner"...

My daughter is old enough to ignore the comments because she knows this is not the Nana she grew up with!
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Cwillie .......... spot on !!!
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Guilt is way overrated. Especially when misplaced.
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Deborah.. I was thinking the same. Who the heck are you getting all this 'Credit' from? Let me know .. so I can get some credit as well! ;)
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Since your mom is with you due to financial problems and is not in need of care there is absolutely no reason for you to worry about leaving her alone while you enjoy your vacation. In a way this experience is a blessing in disguise, when the day comes that your mom actually does need hands on care you will know to run like the wind... lol
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Me and my husband have a 9 day vacation planned for next month. I was feeling guilty ( HUH ??? ) about it until this morning. Now Im going with a HUGE smile on my face. we DESERVE a vacation and its not coming fast enough. I guarantee you this sister wont volunteer to have mom at her house even for a couple of weeks. Its much easier for her to complain to everyone than it is to do something about something.
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There are a lot of people who have parental care and sibling discord. In fact, I'm not sure if I know anyone who doesn't have it. lol I see it all around me. And it doesn't stop there. Wait until the Will is read. It gets worse after the funeral. Adult children get so upset and some never speak to each other again.

I have a great family. I really do, but I expect anything down the road, based on what I have seen.
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I need to piggyback on the question asked by 1golflady. I have three brothers who have been in denial and accuse me of over-reacting. My mom was diagnosed in 2013 (age 81 now) with early stage Alzheimer's. I have been taking care of her since then. At first it wasn't much; this past year she has progressed in her disease and I do more. She has her own apartment but I am over there two to three times a week at night bringing her dinner or cooking dinner for her. I grocery shop for her, I go to all her Dr. appointments with her, I write her notes to remember to do things or how to do things. This week she took a turn for the worse with hallucinations & driving around at 4 a.m. in the morning. I quickly got into her neuro-psychologist and he informed me she could no longer be left alone. She is at my house now and I was able to find an adult day care right by my work and I drop her off and pick her up. Today is her first day. HOWEVER; my brothers got wind of her last episode and are now in panic mode and upsetting both of us. They accuse me of hiding her, calling me names and indicating that I'm not doing a good job, etc. To give you an idea; they saw my mom on Christmas & excluded me from the gathering, then they didn't see her again until Mother's Day ~ that's 5 months! I asked them two years ago when they cooked to make a plate for her and drop it off - they never have. They rarely call her and never call me to see what is going on and how she is doing. But boy, now they are jumping at the bit to get involved and cause trouble. One of them even picked the lock and broke into my house the other night! She is calm and relaxed with me; she has been sleeping well and I am cooking for her so she is also eating better. They keep texting me, telling me that I just want to be the "Queen Bee" and the one to get all the credit for caring for her, etc. I have broken all ties with the two younger brothers because they have broken my heart too many times and I will not allow it to happen again! The brother closest in age to me is now taking their side and the one breaking in, yelling at me and calling me names. What do I do? Who would I get credit from? I don't have any close friends and no children of my own to help me. I'm sick and tired of them 'forgetting' about mom and only jumping into crisis mode when there is an event. They don't know anything about how she has been or even the Dr. appointments we have had for her other illnesses, let alone what her capabilities are. Can I get restraining orders against them?
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