My father had a stroke in early July. At 88 years old he was living independently with our step mother, age 89. Her activity is limited due to various health issues and uses a walker around the house and wheel chair for distances greater than 50 feet. My sister and I who both live 2 hours and 3 hours away from them helped them transition thru the rehab process and setting up in home 24 care. I retired, so I could spend weekdays helping and my sister spent the weekends with them. Along with one care giver in house 24/7 we were able to help satisfy dads needs and step mothers as well. After about six weeks they decided they didn't want us to stay with them any longer. Step mother became very hostile towards us and my father confided that he believed she was suffering from dementia. She was also trying to stop taking Lorazepam which she used for anxiety and pain relief. He asked us to give them a couple of weeks and hopefully she would calm down. It's been over a month since we have been able to call or visit. Meanwhile, the caregivers report to me that step mom is withholding dads medications and dad has fallen 3X when his caregiver is sent out to run errands and buy groceries. My sister has tried calling to ask if we can make a brief visit for Thanksgiving and was hung up on. At this point, my father seems to also be against us. My last attempt to call him to find out what we did wrong or how we could make amends and at least visit, he had no clear explanation and she started yelling about how when we were there we used their car to run errands. I tried to explain it was easier for me since her wheelchair didn't fit in my car. Then they hung up. Anyway, that's one example of the confusion and inaccurate memories of events leading up to my sister and I from being prevented form spending precious time with our dad. How can we get past the misconceptions and mistrust issues when being completely shut out? Also concerned about dads safety since step mother seems to make irrational decisions regarding his health care.