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Mother cannot let me finish more than a single sentence without interrupting. Usually to comment on something, anything, it reminds her of. Often leads to a long story that takes the conversation completely away from the subject under discussion. She is fiercely independent and controlling, but still asks my opinion and wants my input on absolutely everything. She does not have dementia, and often I need to reason with her on why a certain course needs to be taken. I take care of her business matters as well as many other things as her vision is extremely poor. If I make a suggestion or give an opinion without an explanation, her knee-jerk reaction is to disagree with me. But it is hard to use any experience, illustration, etc., to reason with her because I cannot keep the conversation going in a particular direction long enough to make a point. This has always been a problem, but is getting worse. Partly because I cannot stay focused with the constant interruption. I have BEGGED her to let me finish what I am saying. If I am reading a paragraph, I say , Please let me finish this before you comment. Doesn’t work. I have said “Please let me finish” so many times that now it just irritates her, and if I make any comment while she is talking (which is always), she snaps back, “let me finish, that is always what you are telling me”. She has this tendency with others, but nowhere to the extent she does it with me. How can I reason with her and keep my train of thought?

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has she always been like that? maybe she is still in the 'role' of im older, so I know more. even though you are at her level now.

my sister and my husband are like that too. I start a conversation and before I know it. my husband is asking questions before I can tell my story. its like shut- up :) and I will get to it. but he doesn't want to hear me speak for longer than 1 minute. he wants to know everything in 30 seconds. (ok im a little long winded)
with my sister, I try to tell my story, and it reminds HER of something...and she overrides me and then we are talking about HER.

after awhile. I just stopped sharing. or if they take over - I act bored with their story.

problem is if someone is like that, they probably NOT going to change. butting up against it is only causing you to be upset.

try to keep what you say as short and sweet as possible.
                                    
                                          ** just the facts ma'am**

I find other people I know (girlfriends) to be 'listeners' and don't jump in to take over.
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Reply to wally003
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Since her eyesight is poor I would suggest recording what you want to say, start the recording playing and leave the room. Be interesting to know how many times mom tries to interrupt the recording...
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cwillie Aug 2, 2018
I've reread this several times, where did you read she had poor eyesight?
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If it’s any consolation, my husband constantly interrupts as well. It harkens back to when he was out and about and a successful business owner; college educated, a total Type A personality. I was just a “hick” from a small town. Now, he’s bedbound and totally out of touch. I am up on current events, and when we watch shows like “Jeopardy”, I get a lot more answers right than he does.

But, when we are having a conversation, he often will interrupt, and like you, I lose my train of thought. I will stop talking, ask him if he’s finished interrupting me and ask him if I now have his permission to continue. It actually has gotten somewhat better. Now, he is becoming more and more hard of hearing. I have to repeat almost everything I say to him. It’s like living my life twice...🙄🙄
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Reply to Ahmijoy
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"but still asks my opinion and wants my input on absolutely everything."

I'm gonna suggest she doesn't want your opinion at all, that is just her way to draw you in. If there is any information she really needs to know write it down for her to study at her leisure. As for the segue off into long, drawn out irrelevant conversations - my sister does this and I indulge her up to a point, but when I've had enough I've learned to butt in and change the subject or bluntly tell her I'm not interested and have had enough, both strategies usually lead to a rapid goodbye.
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Learn2Cope Aug 2, 2018
Yes, it is true that often she does not really want my opinion. She really just wants to have a reason to start a conversation, or validation on whatever opinion she has already formed. However, she is legally blind so the things that she normally would have read for herself she has to rely on me for. I try to remind myself to wait to see if it is actually something that needs my input. Need to work on that more.
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Who says she doesn't have dementia?

If you can't reason with someone, your choices ( imo) are that your are dealing with someone with a personality disorder or someone who has developed a cognitive issue.
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Reply to BarbBrooklyn
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Learn2Cope Aug 2, 2018
I don't think she technically has a personality disorder, but leans in that direction. She does have an anxiety disorder and when she is anxious is when she is the most difficult to reason with. When I know she is upset about something I guess I should try to put off most discussions. A little hard when she is obsessing about something and that is why she wants to talk about it. And she can go from calm to anxious pretty quickly.
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