Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Just lost my dad, she has severe Alzheimer’s and we need to put her into memory care. She of course does not want to go. She will also be losing her dog.
You don't tell her she going. You tell her you are going to visit a friend of yours. You do not / cannot talk logic or reason to a person who has Alzheimer's.
If she likes ice cream, you tell her you are taking her out for an ice cream cone. You tell her anything that will get her to agree to get up. And, you keep smiling all the time to re-assure her.
Unfortunately, my brother and I had to call the police to bring my mother to the hospital because she wanted to die on the couch in the living room. After being discharged from the hospital, we had her all set up to be admitted to Assisted Living which was just one block from her house. It was brutal since she thought she was going home after the hospital. However, she managed to live a year and a half longer in her Memory Care unit. Had she stayed home, she would have died within weeks most likely.
Mom had a hospital visit before and the staff explained to her that she would be headed to a facility after that. She was not happy about the move, but she adjusted. I brought a few things from her home and photos of the grandkids. The staff worked hard to get her involved in activities.
visit a few and ask the marketing person suggestions on how to move her without her knowing. They will tell you plenty of successful ways to do it. Do not reason with her. Her brain is damaged. She will adjust once she gets there.
I have contact with somebody who takes in dogs when the aging owner needs to be moved to a nursing facility. My father is actually looking for a dog just like that. Please let me know if you’re interested in the rescue organization and if it’s a small dog and maybe a female, I know we would be interested!
My mom agreed to go to rehab since she was using a walker and had fallen a couple of times. In September of 2023, I took her for a “while”. I don’t feel comfortable outright lying so I use language that feels right; I call it strategic truth. Mom has no concept of time any longer so I give vague answers like “ at least a couple more days” when she asks when she is going home. Most days she tells me she just got there and often asks how I knew she was there.
Amazon sells some very realistic looking dogs and cats that actually do a little moving. Perhaps she would find one of those comforting. I believe the name is Perfect Petz. Maybe this would help in more ways than one.
If the dementia is severe, or anything past early stage, the move shouldn’t be discussed with her at all. Of course she will be against any move, anything unfamiliar will be opposed, she’s lost the ability to make sounds decisions and good judgments, so she cannot be consulted on this. Any good memory care place will have a director well versed in how to best make the move happen. Consult them for advice on this. As for the pet, it’s sad but necessary, tell her the dog died due to the health issues of old age. I wish you both well in this transition
If at all possible, please contact a rescue organization that specializes in senior and special needs dogs before committing to having the dog euthanized.
I know of many folks that just told their loved one that they were taking them to lunch(at the memory care facility, but don't tell your mom that)and when lunch was over they had the aides offer to take and show their loved one around the facility, while the family then left and let the aides take the person to their new room which you as the family will already have set up with some of moms favorite things so she will feel more comfortable. And then allow your mom time to adjust to her new surroundings and the folks caring for her before you go visit her. I know most memory care facilities will tell family to stay away for a week or 2, to give their loved one time to adjust, but you have to do whatever you feel comfortable with. And since moms dog has to be put down anyway, perhaps having a nice picture of it in her room would be helpful. I wish you well in doing what is best for your mom to keep her safe and looked after 24/7.
I'm sorry about your dad. Regarding just one small aspect of the current situation, who will be caring for the dog? Would it be possible for that person or family to bring the dog to visit your mom when she is living in a memory care facility?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
You tell her you are going to visit a friend of yours.
You do not / cannot talk logic or reason to a person who has Alzheimer's.
If she likes ice cream, you tell her you are taking her out for an ice cream cone. You tell her anything that will get her to agree to get up. And, you keep smiling all the time to re-assure her.
Gena / Touch Matters
After being discharged from the hospital, we had her all set up to be admitted to Assisted Living which was just one block from her house. It was brutal since she thought she was going home after the hospital. However, she managed to live a year and a half longer in her Memory Care unit. Had she stayed home, she would have died within weeks most likely.
Do not reason with her. Her brain is damaged. She will adjust once she gets there.
Amazon sells some very realistic looking dogs and cats that actually do a little moving. Perhaps she would find one of those comforting. I believe the name is Perfect Petz. Maybe this would help in more ways than one.
And then allow your mom time to adjust to her new surroundings and the folks caring for her before you go visit her.
I know most memory care facilities will tell family to stay away for a week or 2, to give their loved one time to adjust, but you have to do whatever you feel comfortable with.
And since moms dog has to be put down anyway, perhaps having a nice picture of it in her room would be helpful.
I wish you well in doing what is best for your mom to keep her safe and looked after 24/7.