In my state, his wife would have responsibility for what happens with his care, not his daughter, unless he’s legally designated the daughter. How could you prove his wife is a financial predator? Not likely. They’re legally wed, he wasn’t diagnosed with dementia beforehand, and they can do what they want.
How did he meet this woman? Was she working at his assisted living? Do you have a timeline of when she met him and when certain milestones were in their relationship?
A bit of advice, once you have Guardianship I would transition your dad to Memory Care rather than have him residing in Assisted Living. You could better control who visits and he is more restricted as to when and how he can come and go. And if he married AFTER the diagnosis of Dementia the "contract" AKA "marriage" is not legal as he is not competent to enter into a contract. He will adjust. You are doing this for his physical safety, his financial security
Capacity to marry requires that the person understand his responsibilities and the contract to marry. Cognitive decline doesn’t necessarily mean he doesn’t understand. People with cognitive issues can and do buy and sell property, renew drivers licenses, marry and divorce. Cognitive decline doesn’t necessarily mean that a person loses all rights. You might not even know that a person is in cognitive decline when you do business with or marry them. So a broad blanket statement that he didn’t have capacity won’t work. Assessing each individual case is necessary. The courts are called upon to do this.
Did he marry with a formal diagnosis of Dementia. If so, he is not competent to sign a marriage contract. Have you asked a lawyer about that. Maybe the wedding can be annulled.
I am sorry to hear you and your father are going through all this. I do think that given he married, a judge will have a hard time sorting out your story and your Father's wishes to provide at least something for his wife upon his death. If your father comes across at all understanding what is happening even though he DOES have a diagnosis of dementia, and if there is a fight for guardianship, do know that he will be provided an attorney, that he may in fact win, or that he may be assigned a guardian by the court if the court suspects this is about the fight of a beneficiary at your Dad's death protecting his future assets. I know that your own attorney will have told you all of this. I wish you good luck moving forward. If the judge suggests a negotiated mediation for providing for your Dad's wife, I think it may be wise to accept that.
Thank you, and yes, I'm aware of all that. I'm really interested in how others have tried to heal a parental relationship that has been ruptured by seeking guardianship and conservatorship. I did not do this without a lot of thought, study, and preparation. I knew this would happen. I don't know what will happen to our relationship after the hearing, regardless of the judge's decision. I suspect he will forget that it ever happened. He doesn't know what happened a few hours ago. Seeking other's experience.
And if he married AFTER the diagnosis of Dementia the "contract" AKA "marriage" is not legal as he is not competent to enter into a contract.
He will adjust.
You are doing this for his physical safety, his financial security
I wish you good luck moving forward. If the judge suggests a negotiated mediation for providing for your Dad's wife, I think it may be wise to accept that.