IMO they become small children again. They get a scrape the cry like a 4 yr old because it hurts. For an adult without a Dementia a scrape hurts but they don't cry about it. Like said, telling them no means to them your abusing them because they don't like being said no to. Or, your forced them to get a shower. You were mean to them. Thats the world of Dementia.
Dementia “truth” is whatever that is in the mind of the dementia patient at the moment it is being verbalized.
“Changing the story” is what dementia patients DO.
So there is absolutely NO WAY for the listener/caregiver to know what “the truth” is unless they themself see it as it happens or a reliable informant reports it.
You use deductive reasoning. If the complaint is about physical abuse you look for indications of physical abuse. Bruises but keep in mind that as people age the skin bruises easier and some medication will make bruises worse or look worse. Do you see the spouse getting physical? Do you hear verbal abuse? Are clothes clean? Is the person clean? Is the person dry, are soiled clothes changed as soon as possible? Most of the time it is observing. It is observing the spouse that is the caregiver and how they do things. If they get short tempered, frustrated it is possible that what they truly need is HELP. Respite care, more outside caregiving hours, more support from friends and family just a break.
If you would care to give more info. Are you concerned about someone that is possibly being abused? If so you can report it. All states have an Elder Abuse Hotline.
“Changing the story” is what dementia patients DO.
So there is absolutely NO WAY for the listener/caregiver to know what “the truth” is unless they themself see it as it happens or a reliable informant reports it.
If the complaint is about physical abuse you look for indications of physical abuse.
Bruises but keep in mind that as people age the skin bruises easier and some medication will make bruises worse or look worse.
Do you see the spouse getting physical?
Do you hear verbal abuse?
Are clothes clean?
Is the person clean?
Is the person dry, are soiled clothes changed as soon as possible?
Most of the time it is observing. It is observing the spouse that is the caregiver and how they do things. If they get short tempered, frustrated it is possible that what they truly need is HELP. Respite care, more outside caregiving hours, more support from friends and family just a break.
If you would care to give more info.
Are you concerned about someone that is possibly being abused? If so you can report it. All states have an Elder Abuse Hotline.
What do you see on a long visit?