Choosing between my child's happiness and parent's. I'm glad you asked "how do you do it?" because I'm close to losing it, in tears all the time. I'm a single parent of a teenage girl who lives with me full time and have no siblings. My 84 year old father with Parkinsons also lives with us. It is primarily through the sale of his home that we were able to buy this one. Although I pay ALL bills and the mortgage, I still feel indebted. Plus culturally I was raised that your older people stay with you until they pass away. But I work full time in a very demanding job. My daughter has long-standing social anxiety and depression issues. My dad is not the joyful type. He's a good and nice man, but not positive. Nor is he active. He is always ...there. Napping sitting up or shuffling around. Griping. My daughter is losing it slowly, getting more depressed each week with him in the house. She loves him but needs a break. He literally refuses to even go out of the house for even an hour (me to take him for a visit with his sister who lives 5 minutes away). She just asked for an empty house for an hour, to lounge on the couch freely without "bothering" him. I literally feel like a mild to medium heart attack (mine) would be welcome just to give me a break that I don't feel guilty about taking. And to open the door to him about looking to move to assisted living before I collapse. How do you start this conversation with someone from an ethnic group where the elders don't go into homes? And how do I manage this guilt?