My mom is 72 years old. Up to and until July 2017, she worked and was fiercely independent. In July 2017, her colon perforated, and she went septic. Due to this, she had to have part of her colon removed and received a colostomy bag. After rehabilitation, she moved in with me as she refused to live on her own after that happened. In September 2017 she went back to work, until December 2017 when she broke her arm. This was the final straw for her. After rehab from the broken arm, she moved in with my sister, who depleted all of her assets and stole from her. In October 2018, I had no choice but to move her back in with me. By this point, my sister had completely depleted what little assets she had left. My mom has no money, and I am the only one caring for her. She still gives money to my sister, who refuses to work, and continues to dwindle away what little money she has left. Therefore, I am picking up all of her living expenses. I work full-time, and am married. My husband and I have seven children total, four of which are still minors (ages 17-13) and we have to care for, my oldest daughter that is 20 lives with us as well. My mom refuses to medically care for herself. Her diabetes is out of control, she has COPD, and a hernia where the colostomy bag is that is literally the size of a small pumpkin. I have to bathe her as she can no longer bathe herself. Due to a busy life, I have to have her take baths when I able to do it. She won't cooperate. My oldest daughter, who is 20, and works at a hospital, has offered to help her bathe as well. She won't cooperate, she will wait until she is ready and not a minute before. She won't be honest with her doctor about her health issues. She won't get a handle on her finances, keeps helping my sister, won't sell her house that has sat empty for nearly two years, and get won't get a handle on her debt. Anytime I try talking with her, she becomes angry and says "I don't walk to talk about it". If I push it, we start fighting. This story could literally go on forever, I just don't know what to do. I am trying to help her, but she is refusing. I don't have POA, and I have been told the only way to force it, is to have her declared incompetent. Seeing that she is extremely independent, when I have mentioned it, she gets extremely mad and says she will never forgive me. I just do not know what to do anymore. I am watching my mom become someone I don't even recognize. She does not care about her health, finances, hygiene, but if I try and step in, she fights me. I am becoming so frustrated and angry, and then I feel guilt. What if something happens to her, and these are my last thoughts about her? I feel lost. Can anyone help with some advice?