I used a wash bowl with warm water and anti bacterial soap mixed in it. It seemed to do the job and you can get the soap with a deodorant in it. I used the same soap when Luz was still able to get into the step in tub.
With my mom I don't ask, I just say today is bath day. Most of the time when it is put like that she will just do it. If she resists I will allow her to defer once. It makes her feel like she still has some choice in her life. She has so little of them left, I like to give her some when I can. If she decides to defer I explain that she can skip it today, but then tomorrow we HAVE to do it and there is no getting out of it. Of course she doesn't remember this tomorrow, but I will remind her that the day before she chose to skip and agreed to do it today. She will usually go ahead with it when she is told she chose this path.
You are singing my song! It has been an issue, but I finally prevailed after many attempts. You might try Baby Wipes for the time being. There are some products in the Health and Beauty area that are waterless, but I have heard that they are ineffective. You might try using someone else to assist you that he feels less "exposed" to, or for SBA if needed. You might see if home health would have better luck. Sometimes you have to take the bull by the horns and just do it, but allow the person to do as much for themselves as they can before you finish up what they can't do, or reach, or don't remember to do. Most of the time, once I succeeded, I could continue doing and set up a calendar so that my mom would know it was shower/bath day, that I was coming to help her, that were going to get this done with as little fuss and muss as possible, and that by the time the battle was over, more time was spent arguing that just doing. Set a timer and get them in and out in 5 minutes or less. Use a shower stool, have everything ready and at hand before you start. Have the heater on no matter if it is 90 degrees already. Have the "undies" ready for them to put on as soon as they are dry. Be smarter than the average bear and be ready for anything that might come up. Make sure you have a movable shower head attached to the shower. Good luck!
My husband is bed bound and incontinent. Keeping him clean and odor free is a challenge. I purchased a large bag of about 20 white, terry cloth wash cloths from Lowe’s of all places. They are very utilitarian and nothing fancy, but it’s almost two years later and I still have at least half left. I also use the rinse less soap from Walgreens in the same aisle with the adult incontinence briefs. It’s important for me to use a barrier cream, and I use whatever diaper rash cream is on sale. I did at one time use apple cider vinegar, but it was a bit too harsh for my husband’s skin. I do, however, use it in his laundry.
One thing that a nurse practitioner suggested to me was the use of ACV. (Apple cider vinegar). It cleans and disinfects and kills odors. The smell of vinegar disappears within a couple minutes.
For my mother, I bought bathing/wash cloths at CVS or Walgreen's. They are in the first aid section, or the adult diaper, etc. section. Not the beauty/cosmetic or body wash section. Usually in resealable packs of 8 or 10. Some are pre-moistened, others are warm water activated. They do not require rinsing after using. I actually use the same thing myself.....on off-days.
For private parts: that's the biggest problem. Lightly warm water and a very soft cloth with a little bit of plain white bar soap is what was recommended to me. The wipes that you can buy that are almost the same as baby wipes can be harsh on elderly people.
Often, my best sources for information have been local medical supply stores and the pharmacist where we fill all of our prescriptions.
Do you know what is behind his refusal? What's he got against it?
For private parts: that's the biggest problem. Lightly warm water and a very soft cloth with a little bit of plain white bar soap is what was recommended to me. The wipes that you can buy that are almost the same as baby wipes can be harsh on elderly people.
Often, my best sources for information have been local medical supply stores and the pharmacist where we fill all of our prescriptions.