How to deal with no help from family?

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I don't know how to deal with my situation any longer. I have two brothers and a sister. Do not help. I had to move back in with my mother in 2009 because the doctor said she should be alone because of surgeries and just being frail. I take her to the doctors and what she loves to go to get the attention he doesn't want to do anything else hang out with people her age or do any kind of social activities. She's very negative and very miserable every day and it's really hard to be around. Her love can do nothing wrong. He comes over and eats and leaves. My sister in Florida comes by once a year and it's pretty much on vacation running around with her family. My other brother is an alcoholic so he calls maybe twice a year. I have work for a job since I moved in here very part time just so I could take her to the doctors and everything. But the boss I had was not paying me anything so I left and decided to join another job in which I don't get very much work. My mother will call me if something happens to her so I feel like I can't get away from home. I haven't dated since I moved in here. I'm quite miserable to which I've lost a lot of friends because I'm so miserable. And yet it bothers me really bad that my mother has everyone on her will and they will be given as I will even. I am so upset about this because I feel like I gave up my life for her. I can't sleep at night because of the depression that I have and the life that I lost and yet my family moves on. They have lives they go on vacation they're married. Do you think that I'm here cuz I need a place to live. So they don't even see what I I'm here for. Is it right that my mother put everybody on her well evenly? If something happens to her this house will be divided up. I need some advice.

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I completely agree ohjude. I was looking through insurance papers the other day and discovered to keep the boyfriends mom in house and medicated, they are paying close to 25k a month. Thats not including er visits...its ridiculous. Then her case manager came and even though she threatens to kill herself, she signed papers to be a full code.
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painting? Improving that should read - that will teach me to have a DIY programme on in the background
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Hmmm I do wonder about all the work that is being done to extend our lives so much. Do I really want to live in a worn out body? I really do think it would take a brave person to stand up and say this is the natural order of things - let's focus on painting the health of the younger people and caring properly for the elderly people rather than lash out exorbitant money - billions worldwide on making people live longer and increasing the stress on caregivers
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Jessie, there should be socialized medicine for everyone in the country. The problem is in my opinion, creating such unaffordable drugs. The copay for the elderly is ridiculous
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What bothers me about all this is that a handful of people control the wealth of America. Their wealth was made on the backs of the people. In the old days there were pensions and other signs of loyalty from employers. Now people are treated like ants having no value. Old people are treated so poorly that it makes me ashamed of the country. It seems like they are seen more as cash cows than anything. Estates are becoming a thing of the past, because the medical and care communities have drained them. It isn't enough, though. The government is targeted, too, through Medicaid.

We do need socialized care for our elderly. There has been a great fight against it, saying it would cost too much and the care would be substandard. I guess we could make the same argument about public schools -- cost too much and the teachers aren't that great. We know that is not true. Something becomes what we make it to be.

There is such discrimination against old people in this country. I would love to see a system like they have in Norway, but we would have to pay a lot of attention to immigration (just like Norway does). We wouldn't want people working all their lives somewhere else, then coming to the USA to take advantage of the benefits.

I would like to see the USA care as much about its old people as they do about its young.
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Life insurance (as seen on tv between all the ambulance chasing commercials on daytime tv) and long-term care insurance are not a simple solution. For the former, as noted, won't pay out if you die within 2 years, and you have to buy more insurance 'units' to make it worthwhile than you ever dreamed of. Long term care premiums are hideously expensive, the older you get, you might as well just put a thousand dollars a month in the bank and be done with it ( and I am sure there's something that makes long term care insurance at a late date not worthwhile)
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Jowilson002 Why do you hate to tell her No? If she doesn't know she is putting a burden on you, she has no reason to stop. Why are you using your money? Why doesn't she use her own money?
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What do you do when your elderly loved one just wants to shop and spend money every weekend? My mom is in a really great nursing home where she is happy. She chose to go there but I go get her on weekends to spend time with her but all she wants to shop and I make less than $ 30,000 a year and have a house note and other expenses. It's really putting a strain on me. She also has ver u expensive tastes. I hate to tell her no.
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automatic deductions for insurance?
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Jessebelle, you are so right about that insurance, their automatic deductions were a problem also, like giving another big corporation permission to help themselves to your checking account-cancelled that !!
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