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She does Not have Alzheimer’s! She has no friends and is very judgmental. Tells people they are “nobodies, no accounts,” and she is not going to sit at the same table and eat with them! My brother and I are Mortified and can not understand how she can say such things to peoples faces! She is not remorseful and shows no shame when called out!! AL facility will not “put her out” because her check clears the bank and is a competitive and lucrative business!


At wits ends, please help!!!

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Mom is bored, This keeps her entertained.
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Nanajan1234 Jun 15, 2019
Interesting....my husband said the Very Same Thing! Better than No attention at all!!!!
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The ALF might have another think about how much they want to keep your mother if other people's relatives start moving them because she is making their lives a misery. I wouldn't be too sure.

Having said that, you and your brother are not responsible for your mother's bad manners - if it is a matter of bad manners, which I kind of doubt actually - and certainly it is not for you to correct her; though you can of course feel free to dissent from any hurtful opinions she might express, and apologise on her behalf if you think it would be well-received.

You say she knows right from wrong. You also say she is not remorseful and shows no shame about having been rude. So what kind of behaviour does she consider "wrong" that makes you confident she can tell the difference, then?
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My mother said cringe-worthy things in her facility too. She also had dementia. The staff just considered the source and other residents paid no attention to her. They had their own little quirks.

The facility would not “put her out” because she can’t control her mouth.
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She has Dementia and has lost her filters. She may have been like this all along but could cover it up. Now can't. Not much u can do about it. You could say to her, Mom thats not nice. But probably will do no good.
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You have described my mother, she is 94, I do not get involved in her tirades, it serves no purpose, nothing will change. Step back and let the chips fall where they may. You cannot micro manage another's life.
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