This is the 2nd time in the last 2 years that he has gotten upset. I usually walk a mile for coffee in the morning and have made a nice group of friends. I have taken him there and he has met everybody and they make a lot of him when I bring him in . The first guy was 12 years younger and single he swore he heard me talking on the phone and hanging up when he came in the room. It doesn't help that his picture is in his ad in the Sunday paper so that it stays in his mind. This Sunday we were having coffee with our group and when one of the fellows left and I gave I'm a hug and kiss good by, He is leaving for California and will not be back for a couple of months .He is in his mid 40's and I am 72 ,Husband has decided that I kissed on the mouth. The easiest thing would be to give my morning coffee group .This is the only time I get out of the house and get to feel like a real person. My husband walks with a walker is incontinent and I am never gone for more than an hour and half because of his falling. It is so hard to have someone you love loose their faith in you. We used to have a large social circle and a hug hello or good by was just a part of being social. I did mention to the doctor the last time and she laughed but it is not funny.
I have resorted to limiting my visits w my sister to some degree (but not my time for myself for sanity sake). And for the sake of peace, the times I do go to my sister's I tell him I am at my daughter's which he doesn't mind as much. The stress isn't worth it.
I'm not sure if it would be appropriate now, but I would look into medication options. Many patients obtain relief with medications. Depending on how he progresses, that might be something to consider in the future.
DO NOT GIVE UP your coffee group. Sounds fun, good socialization, neccessary exercise...keeps you sane...keeps you young! As things progress, you will need your friends! I doesnt matter if you were riding around town with a carload of fraternity boys or having coffee with another woman....he will be jealous when not the complete center of attention.....good luck!
I would read a lot about dementia and how it causes people to think things that are not true. This may help you accept that it's nothing you are doing. It's not his fault. It's the illness, not him. You can't take what he says to you at face value, because it is likely to make no sense. Some dementia patients accuse loved ones of stealing their money, egging their car, trying to kill them, etc. It's not based on reality. So, I would work on accepting his allegations and coming up with responses to him that will calm your husband. You aren't likely to convince him he is wrong. Later on, he may not remember any of this talk,