How to deal with hospital stay? Do we have the right to change his hospital?

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My father as severe dementia. He has limited speech but can communicate a little bit. He has been admitted to a terrible hospital for urinary retention where they put in a catheter (after many tries and much pain). They have had him there for 3 days now with minimal answers to any of our questions about how long (we are there round the clock), what they will do next, and when and if we can take him home (if there is a wait for a prostate procedure). We called an alternate hospital and they have said it is our responsibility to keep his catheter in and that they will not admit him if we get him to their emergency room. We are very confused about how to get him out of there, home, rent a hospital bed, get a nurse, and keep him sedated enough to keep the catheter in and get him out of there. He is weakening every day!

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Ask if he's eligible for rehab. Might this be a good juncure to transfer him to a facility if he needs 24/7 care?
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The hospital has a social worker. Usually the social worker or the "discharge planner" is the person who can help you with "how is all this going to happen?" questions. That person can also give you referrals or tell you the process for getting the doctor to recommend the equipment needed at home. Council on Aging, Senior Centers. These places have social workers or consultants who come and assess what you need and then show you where to get it. Sometimes they provide some money for it, or show you how to get it through health insurance. which is the best because they'll come and just set it all up for you. Our Senior Center has extra equipment they just give away. Craigslist is also good if you have the ability and a truck to pick up things. It's great that you have the whole family who wants to care and be involved. You are so lucky that way. Blessings!
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OK, they will want to talk to MOM if she is his wife. Please read all the discharge documents carefully, it will list medications, who to call and any follow up appointments.
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Thank you, all. "We", are my mother and 2 sisters, all taking turns being with him 24/7. Doctor had suggested taking him home but nurse's had no information on when/how this would take place (that was yesterday morning and it is now almost 4pm Sunday). We took him to emergency after 2 weeks of pain and waiting for his urologist to have time to see him after the home care doctor recommended it (two weeks ago!). He was admitted on Thursday afternoon. Just heard 2 minutes ago that they are discharging him tomorrow! Arranging for a home care nurse and follow up. Thank you everyone for the quick responses. This is new territory; he hasn't had to have emergency care while this far along in his disease!
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Do not take your Dad out of the hospital against doctors advice, because if you do and he has to be readmitted due to that decision, insurance will not pay. You may be asking questions that have no immediate answers. Three days is not long enough for a proper diagnosis, especially if it is over a weekend admission. The only way to transfer you dad out of that hospital is if he needed a higher level of care that the hospital could not provide.
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I don't know who WE is. Is anyone there a POA or Health Care Proxy? Those are the only people the hospital will disclose information to. If he developed urinary retention at home, they are certainly NOT going to let him go home until the problem is fixed. How did he get to the hospital??
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If you remove Dad from the hospital against doctor's orders, your Dad's health insurance might not cover his stay or might not cover his return to the hospital for more care.

Remember your Dad has only been in the hospital for 3 days, it takes time to run tests and get results, especially if there is an infection, and especially if the patient is elderly. For your Dad's well being, let the professionals do their job without a lot of interference from the family.
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