Follow
Share

I feel I have given till there is no more to give. A sister who lives 4 hours away and a brother who lives 10 mins away but both are not a part of Mom's care. I have 2 teens who live with as well. I'm lucky that they are great kids and help..I realize my stress level is very high and I look forward to bedtime..I also cared for my Dad till he passed away less than a year ago. I'm glad that we are able to care for my mom and I know that my relationship with my siblings will never be the same. I forgive them and I even understand that this is not for everyone but I sure would like a weekend away. Thanks for caring. Love x3

Find Care & Housing
Most brothers simply assume this is "women's work" and would not make good babysitters.   Your out of town sister may not realize how hard this is for you.  Call her up and ask if you could trade places for a weekend.  The break will do you good and it will be very illuminating for a sister who thinks everything is just fine.  If that doesn't work, you get those teenagers to take over for a day.  Then you go to a spa day.
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to pamstegma
Report

Can your mom or you afford to get a sitter for mom one night a month or a week? Or is their someone eles you could have sit with mom for a few hrs a week? There is Daycare for seniors. You can look up online on your city web site to see what programs are available. Just a idea!

You need to find time throughout the day to recharge. Even if it is 5 minutes in the bathroom. Think of yourself this way, you are like a car battery that is being drained but never allowed to recharge, and we know what happens to the battery when it doesn't get recharge. You have to take care of yourself.

When I get stress out I put myself in time-out whether for 5 mins or 30 mins and my boyfriend and my mother knows to not bother me. I also try to meditate. Some one talked about nature sounds on YouTube which I have found helpful to destress. You need to find time and something that you can do to destress you.

And you need to evaluate what has to be done; what things can wait; what you can say no to!

Remember if you don't take care of yourself, who will?

Just think about it!
Take care of yourself...Please!
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to Shell38314
Report

Although I do not have children, I can relate. Last February, I moved my mother into assisted living. Since my eldest sister lives several states away, I'm my mother's primary caregiver. While I understand that she is not in a capacity to help, I often wish my sister was in the capacity to help. Since I'm relatively new to being a caregiver, I really don't have much advice to give except to say that your very post on the AgingCare forums means that you are doing the best you can. While all different kinds of people post on these forums, most people who do post in these forums are doing just that, doing the best that they can. For me, just reading all the various kinds of posts on the AgingCare site inspires me to do the best I can do even if my very best doesn't look like the "best." So, I think you are doing the best that you can do. It may not feel like the best. It may not look like the best. But who says that our landings have to be spot on all the time, you get what I mean?
Helpful Answer (4)
Reply to Rhetorica
Report

Ask a Question

Subscribe to
Our Newsletter