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My husband is diagnosed with PD and has recently been diagnosed with mild to moderate cognitive decline.
He is on a new medication which is a patch to help slow down the progression.
He believes the patch is for his vivid dreams from his other medications, while this is partly true, at his visit to neurologist last week, she said this will help him with the cognitive issues, my husband refuses to accept he has issues. I had him call the doctor to let him talk to her again as he for whatever reason felt I was wrong. He has gotten more argumentative with me over small things. He called the doctor 3 different times. He doesn't remember making the call. I showed him the number on his cell phone, but his realization and responses are ones that indicate he is in denial or he really doesn't remember.
I just don't want to frustrate him as I know that it can make his symptoms worse.
Anyone ever gone through this or has suggestions?

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Check out the various Parkinson's Disease groups for financial assistance for respite care. You may be able to get some help for relief and advice about how to go forward.
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Reply to vegaslady
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My husband does not know he has been diagnosed with dementia. A year after our PCP told me Gary was showing signs of dementia, Gary fell and hit his head, causing a sub dural hematoma,which required 2 surgeries 3 days apart.
When he gets frustrated about not being able to think of a word, or how to put his shoes on, or how to pull the covers up when he goes to bed, we blame it on the brain surgery. That seems to appease and calm him, because of the visible scar on this head, which he can also feel when he combs his hair. I will never let him know he has dementia, and all our friends and family know not to mention it. He would be so depressed to know he had a disease there is no cure for, he wouldn't want to live.
So don't tell him he's declining. If he's aware of the PD, let that be the cause of everything.
Sending you a big hug cuz it SUCKS to watch your loved one decline and you can't do anything about it.
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Reply to Maple3044
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This has got to be so frustrating for you. This is a great site to connect with others caring for someone with cognitive decline. You got some really good suggestions to your situation on this site. Trying to reason with someone with this issue is like beating your head on the wall. Keep us updated and make sure you are taking care of yourself as you are under a lot of stress.
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Reply to Violet2021
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Your husbands brain is broken, and try as you might, he will never really comprehend it. So quit trying. Just try and make his life as positive and stress free as possible.
My husband was diagnosed with vascular dementia in July 2018, and at the time I was told by his neurologist, had a life time expectancy of 5-7 years. It has since changed to just 5 years. I never shared with my husband his diagnosis, and just let him live out the rest of his life the best he could, as him knowing would have only served to upset him.
He died 8 1/2 months ago, and I have no regrets with my decision.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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thingsarecrazy8 Jun 10, 2021
Thank you for your insight and so sorry for your loss.
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Dear thingsarecrazy,
Dementia symptoms often accompany PD. His dementia will cause you to re-evaluate your approach to his behavior. Although your desire to help him understand this new diagnosis is commendable, he doesn't understand what's going on, and is apparently not willing to accept it. Your job, now, is to learn how dementia affects him and how you respond to him. As if PD isn't enough of a challenge to you, and certainly your husband, dementia adds another layer of difficulty. As his symptoms progress, he will become more detached from reality, which will cause your role as his primary caregiver to be that much more challenging. Of course, correcting him or trying to convince him of his decline isn't going to work. Your job is to become educated about not only PD, which you may already be, but also dementia. “The 36 Hour Day” and “Surviving Alzheimer's” are two excellent books especially written for caregivers that will offer practical tips, help explain your husband's behavior, why it occurs, and what to try in response to each. Although Alzheimer's is in the title of the latter book, it addresses dementia symptoms and behaviors that are common to all the dementias. The below link to John Hopkins website can be helpful.

https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/conditions-and-diseases/parkinsons-disease/parkinsons-disease-and-dementia
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Reply to sjplegacy
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thingsarecrazy8 Jun 10, 2021
Thank you. I shall seek out the books.
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What's the point in trying to make DH realize he has cognitive decline??? It's not going to make anything better, nor will it make him happy to know he's in decline with a disease that only worsens with time.

My mother has moderately advanced dementia, lives in Memory Care, and calls the other residents 'stupid morons' b/c there's 'nothing wrong' with her at ALL. She's lived in denial her whole entire life and she's over 94 years old. I don't try to correct her, either, what's the point? The very nature of dementia means they're argumentative, extremely forgetful, and difficult in general. Take care of YOURSELF during this stressful time, that's my suggestion. Get respite care for DH so you can feel like a functional person again. That's really the best thing you can do along with agreeing with him to avoid arguments.

Best of luck!
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Reply to lealonnie1
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thingsarecrazy8 Jun 10, 2021
I wish I could get respite care. Regrettably, the other health issues that affect him as myself are financially draining. I am not old enough for Medicare and can't get work due to my own health for the past 17 years I have been his primary care giver started with his Marfan syndrome diagnosis with aortic dissection and then Parkinson and now the dementia. It is overwhelming especially with cost of Healthcare for myself. I am enrolled in mental health virtual care. It is a blessing.
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Sorry that your husband is declining. Do not try to get him to understand and admit that he has cognitive issues. Due to his problems, he can't understand and even if at all possible, he would be denial anyways. You would think with common sense and logic, he would understand. But now you need to think that this is just not possible anymore. If you come to a place of acceptance, then you work instead on helping him be comfortable and happy instead of getting agitated over things he can't understand anymore.

Good luck!
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Reply to againx100
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My uncle went to classes put on by the Alzheimer's society for those with MCI, as far as I know it was about different practical strategies to help those with early cognitive deficits. But... he was willing and eager, that might not work for you unless you can find a way to make his problems seem less threatening.
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Reply to cwillie
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Please don’t attempt to make him understand his cognitive decline. He simply cannot process it. Far kinder to you both to help with what he needs assistance with and not get into conversation he can’t understand
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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