We have a new problem, but it could have been going on for a while. Dad has his own bathroom so I am not sure when it started but he is not using toilet paper to wipe. How do I know? I finally caught on and marked the roll and left one spare roll. His undies are always bad both ways so that wasn't new. But how do you tactfully approach someone with dementia that they have to wipe their butt? I have a cleaning lady that comes in so I was not noticing the roll being the same until recently... He is also starting to (again) take a shower and put the same underwear back on which in itself is nasty but add in the incontinence issue and it's just bad.