Her dementia comes and goes. Some days she is quite alert and other days she is almost comatose. She has been diagnosed with Alzh.. for about 3 years but only been in nursing care for 5 months. In addition to the dementia, she has 4 broken bones in her back, a pin in her thigh bone, macular degeneration and arthritis. But she is "not" sick.
Or, "The Dr. says you have to get stronger before you come home."
Blame the Dr.
And after you've told her why she has to stay find another activity. Divert her attention away from why she can't come home. Have a snack, take a walk, watch a movie together, anything that will divert your wife's attention.
She too doesn't think she needs help despite being nearly 93 with numerous compression fractures
I try to appeal to the greater good and tell her not everyone is as fortunate as her and we need to help others where we can - it doesn't last long - sigh