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Dad moved into ALF 6 months ago. The first month I visited every day, often stopping by briefly after work (30 minutes to an hour). After the first month, he became active in activities and I began skipping a few days a week.
Now he has a g/f and is involved with activities and ALF outings. I have begun visiting him on weekends only now, but continue to call him every day.

I wonder if I can/should start skipping weekend visits, narrowing my visits to every other weekend. Before he moved into the ALF, he was living by himself 400 miles away. He now lives 3 miles from my house. I do not want him to feel like I am hovering over him, but I don't want him to feel like I am abandoning him.

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What a blessing you are to your father. It is okay to take a weekend off - I know, it's hard. But, it will refresh you and this is important for your own sanity and ability to serve your father.

BTW, I think it is way too cute he already has a girlfriend. He must be a catch!! ;-)
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Your profile doesn't say how old your dad is. My mom is 93 and lives very close to me in an independent living facility. I talk to her twice a day but see her twice a week. I like to keep close tabs on how she's doing because a lot of our elders can sound great on the phone, but there's stuff going on in their apt (like meds not being taken, or food left out, or showers not taken, or feet swelling) that you only see when you're there.

If your dad isn't having any issues and is in pretty good mental and physical health, then just play it by ear. If you have any concerns about how he's doing, then maybe a short weekly visit is appropriate. You're lucky he's so plugged in to his new lifestyle. You obviously picked a great place for him to live!
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I think you're doing a wonderful job already! I don't see how it would be a problem if you would like to skip a weekend. I did that with my mother-in-law when she was in an ALF. But I would tell him in a phone call, and maybe remind him again on Friday or just call him during the weekend. Whichever you're more comfortable with. I'm so happy for you that your dad is getting a better life in the ALF! That's what I wish would happen for all of them.
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