How much is reasonable compensation for her care?

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Mom's income is approx. $1,000/mo from Social Security and she lives with my husband and I. She lives in our home in the master bedroom w/attached bathroom. I am now getting $500/mo for taking care of her. She is wheelchair bound so I cook for her, bathe her, clean her room, and oversee home health which come M-F for a couple of hours a day to help. I would like to know so both siblings and I can feel like everything is a-o-k. Thanks!

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Mom already has Medicaid.
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Joyce, I am sorry to hear that your marriage is crippled anyway, but I hope that can improve.

So, your mother's social security check goes into a joint checking account with your mother and you take $500 from that each month. Without a written and signed agreement between you and your mother as payment for taking care of your mom instead of as your siblings seeing it as rent will be viewed as a gift if she ever needs to apply for medicaid and they do a five year look back. 5 years of $500 per month = $30,000 which Medicaid would expect to be paid back before she could qualify for medicaid and then she would have too much money in the bank to qualify for medicaid.

I'm glad that you have home health coming 5 days a week for 3 hours so that you can get out. It is good that you have that help. I wish you the best in your journey.

Take care of yourself
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So are you wondering about taking additional money from the joint account to cover your time and labor involved in caregiving, or are your sisters prepared to chip in some funds?

Frankly, even if you took the entire $1,000 of your mother's monthly income, it would not pay you even minimum wage for the time and effort you put in, especially with direct expenses like food and utilities figured taken off the top. However, it seems like your Mom probably needs to keep some of those funds for herself. Doesn't she need clothes, hygiene items, OTC meds, entertainment, postage, cell phone?, restaurant meals, gifts and cards for other family members' birthdays and holidays? My mother is 83, and I know that it takes at least several hundred a month to cover all those items for her.

I think maybe a good compromise is to let your Mom spend a reasonable amount for her needs and leave the rest in the joint account, knowing that it will pass to you when she dies. I assume your sisters would be okay with that.
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I won't go into detail about the marriage, which is crippled anyway.... and my health is fine. I do tend to feel housebound, and I just don't think of it as too much of a burden, yet... I do have home health come 3 hours 5/days a week, so I can get out, and mom can be left alone for about 2 hours at others times when she's napping in daytime.
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I am taking $500 right from our joint checking account. She gets automatic deposits direct from Soc. Sec. (US and Canadian, $500+ each). My siblings see that as "rent". They don't say anything about the time and cost of the actual care. Yes, I have both medical and financial POA.
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Where is the $500 a month coming from? Is it coming from your mother's income? If so, do you have a written contract about taking care of her that is signed by both of you? That is really too little when you compare to what it would cost for someone who did an eight hour shift in a twenty four hour day of being an in house caregiver.

I see you are 61. If you have quit a job to take care of mom at home, can your afford that when you consider your own retirement and social security check?

I guess you are her medical and durable POA since you are doing all of the caregiving.

Also, the feeling of isolation and not having a life is only going to get worse as her health continues to fail. This will have an impact upon your marriage, if it has not had one already. It is good that you want to feel and want your siblings to feel that everything is ok financially. I'm concerned about you being ok health wise, financially, and for your marriage to remain healthy. Could your siblings offer any support to you to give you some break time for just you and for you and your husband together? If not, then you may need to look at some other options so that you don't end up throwing your own health and your husband under the bus while taking care of your mom. About one third of caregivers who try to go it alone end up dying before the person they are caring for. You don't want to end up in that %. Also, many people loose their marriage in such a situation as well. You don't want to end up there either, but there are examples of that as collateral damage on this site.

I wish you well and have probably said far more than you wanted to read, but I hope that I've helped.
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I'm not sure I'm understanding your question. First, from where are you getting the $500/month currently? And is that to cover your Mom's room and board or is that compensation for caregiving? If you receive additional money, where will it come from? Your mother's SS? Your sisters' contributions? Medicaid? Not following the scenario you're asking about...sorry.
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I forgot to mention she has both Medicare A, B and D and Medicaid for all medical expenses.
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