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If so what did or do you gain from it.

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Another hand here too. I've had to stop for a period since my insurance changed and my dr. isn't on the plan so have to find a new one. So something else to pile on my plate. Ugh.....
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Hand raised here, currently.
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Of course I've been in therapy! I don't think I would still be sane if I hadn't gone to therapy...I needed to learn how to set and KEEP boundaries, how to speak up when I was in the process of being run over (which has happened so many times I can still see the tire treads across my body), how to say NO and mean it....I was a mess, always thinking I had to do anything and everything for everyone in my life. I felt guilty for even thinking of saying no or for trying to stand up for myself - especially when it came to my parents. I give therapy a two thumbs up award. But you have to find a good therapist, one that will hold you accountable for your actions and push you to grow. I've found that doctors are like shoes....you have to try a few on before you find one that fits! Good luck to you!
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Yes I do see a therapist once a week to help cope with the stress of caring for my husband who suffers from end stage kidney failure, memory loss and other numerous health issues. Attending weekly therapy has allowed me to vent and share issues that I am feeling while watching my loved one, who was once very active, become a person I sometimes do not know. This has been very helpful for me to be able to cope with my care taking issues and has also allowed me some alone time from my daily care taking duties and be in the supportive care of a professional who understands what I am going through.
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I have been on anti-depressants for years... i think mostly due to the verbal abuse over the years from the "X" and my mom..... now i have to take anit-anxiety drugs also. I tried the medical marijuana but it seems like it is too much of a depressant, but it does help with my fibromyalgia... go figure... My mom and pop and and my mom-in-law all need quite a bit of help,my parents are in denial about their health issues... won't use the oxygen... don't want to get addicted to oxygen for heavens sake. won't take the meds like they are supposed too. I am sure like the rest of yall go through. It makes it hard to get them to be even half compliant on doc reccomendations and perscriptions.
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I was a therapist so I find that most of the ones that I try give me the same advice I would give myself, lol. Everyone of them has been much younger than I, so I have been seeing a psychiatrist who manages my anxiety and anti depression meds. That seems to be the best solution for me.
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Is this a trick question?



lol
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When my mother was dying I needed a psychiatrist. I loved that he was clinically detached because it was my problem, not his. I wanted to understand and fix my problems without drugs. I'm not sure how many old-fashioned, conservative psychiatrists like mine are even left out there today. I think it's perverse how insurance companies will pay for drugs but not talk therapy.
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Yes!! Off and on for many years. As a "survivor" of severe abuse (my oldest brother, who is now deceased) and raised by a narcissistic, often very angry mother, I internalized ALL the family angst.
It took me several years and a lot of soul searching to decide to see someone and take meds, as needed.
I look at therapy as a way to have a listening. non-judgmental ear--no friend or family member wants/needs to hear what I have to say. It takes courage to go and hear what they tell you and then implement it. I'm not "there" yet, I still have a horrible relationship with my mother and I am still working on nightmares from my past abuse. I'll be 60 this year. Although my hubby still thinks I'm a mess, I would be SO MUCH WORSE without the help of both my psych dr and therapist.
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I also have a wicked sense of humor and if they don't "get it" then I feel it's their loss :)). And yes, keep on laughing. It keeps me going. Christmas is almost over and I hope everyone was able to enjoy a little "peace" of it. God Bless
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Hi pargirl- the one I was seeing has helped me with other issues too prior to my husband being diagnosed with Frontal Temporal Dementia. I had been to a couple of other counselors before. But I definitely get the most out of someone I can be myself with. I always give a new doctor, counselor or any professional my "humor test". Got to have a sense of humor. Being able to laugh does me a WORLD of good! :) Also being down to "EARTH" !!! Hope everyone has as good as possible Christmas.
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From past experience, I prefer a psychologist over a psychiatrist. Psychologists seem more humanely compassionate, whereas, psychiatrists seem too clinically detached.
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I was told repeatedly to but did not- I truly couldnt handle the thought of meeting a new dr. My primary dr changed my antidepressant to one containing antianxiety properties. I used to see therapists in the past - I truly hope to find a counselor to give me the tools i need .
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Phizphiz.....that's a great point about "clicking". I'm seeing one now just because of all the chaos in my life plus the care giving. Have been 3 or 4 times. Although I don't know if he's the right one for me yet, he has given me some really good ideas for coping. I also agree with support groups. Even if you don't see a therapist it helps with knowing that you aren't the only one going through things plus like this site, you get great info and in site and you will have the added benefit of building bonds with others going through the same thing. Most support groups are lead by trained/experienced leaders who know how to guide the conversation so no one person takes up the whole time. Good luck and God Bless.
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Yes, I do...A psychiatrist, a therapist, a social worker, and I got to support groups 3X a week. Does it help..It keeps my feet on the ground..That way I am better able to take care of my husband...
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I started seeing a therapist about 7 months ago. I see her weekly for the most part. I find it helps me organize my thinking...when I say out loud what is going on I realize how difficult things are. Nice to have a non-judgmental person in my corner who can give me positive feedback and does not expect me to feed, cloth and humor her in return.

You need to find one you click with. Helps if insurance covers this!

Also encourage you to find a local support group. If you think AgingCare.com is fun, having real folks who you get to know and think about...is good too.
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OOOOHHH WOWWWW THATS A GREAT THOUGHT!!!
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Hand raised here.
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Babalou, how I remember those button pushing by my parents or sig other. You'd think I would learn not to explode whenever my Dad [94] said he would start driving again because I couldn't drive him to Home Depot that afternoon. BOOM!! My voice would go up a couple of octaves, my hands would shake, and I am crying on the phone. And Dad would remark for me to call him when I wasn't so upset :P

Now I can just say "whatever" whenever he says something that defies common sense.
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I haven't been in therapy since my non- hands-on caregiving started, but I saw a therapist for several years, many years ago. I learned to recognize what I could control, and when my buttons were being pushed.

Just as an example, it's helpful to be able to say " mom is having an anxiety attack. Those used to really scare me when I was a little girl. They are still upsetting now, but now I can ask that she be given medication for it, instead of ME getting upset and lashing out at someone".

For me, therapy helped me know myself. It's a process you continue on your own, long after the session are over.
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Another hand raised. I've been seeing a therapist going on four years. It is very helpful because I tend to get lost in my caregiving role and need help holding onto my sense of self as someone other than a resource for my mother. I don't intend to stop going until my mother dies or I stop caregiving, whichever comes first.
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Hand raised, I did. One thing I learned from the therapist was that any choices my parents made that my parents needed to be fully responsible for those choices.

Example, my parents chose to remain in their large single family house with a lot of stairs. I felt it wasn't user friendly for someone in their 90's, but my parents weren't going to budge from that place. So whenever my parents would complain about this or that, I would say "well, you chose to remain in this house".

That way I was finally able to set boundaries, which should have been done five years ago, but who knew. Why should I change my life because of "their decisions". Oh I did help, but I had cut way back because my therapist said don't keep enabling them otherwise they would never move, why should they, life was good.
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Thanks for starting this discussion harpcat...I have been considering going to a therapist myself..if I can just carve out some time.

Im glad you found a good therapist phizphiz and that you felt heard..oh god that would be heaven! You are right about talking to family..that just gets me lots of unneeded and misinformed "advice".
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Forgot to mention that another big plus is a therapist can be helpful because they are not family members who can sometimes be difficult and you don't have to deal with all those issues. I felt like I was really being heard.
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Hi Harpcat-I was seeing a therapist before we moved in August and am contacting one in our new town after the first of the year. For me it is very helpful. I didn't "click" with the first two I saw so my advice is to find one that you feel comfortable with. As with doctors I look for one's that I can feel as though I'm talking with a friend. Sense of humor is a must for me and also someone who I can totally trust with all the different emotions I am experiencing. What I looked forward to when my appointment was being able to discuss my situation, get guidance, suggestions and share some laughs. The human contact and being able to have a normal conversation kept me somewhat grounded. Sometimes the conversations would include the NBA or places to shop for a good deal etc. Also funny life experiences, jokes etc. I am looking forward to finding one here. Just last week got my husband signed up for daycare so I could pursue this and get a break. Will be just one day every other week. It's what we can afford. It's a start.
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