We just got my mother into a nursing home. She has diabetes, hypertension, sleep apnea, and just had cyber knife surgery for lung cancer. She cannot and will not take care of herself, ie taking her meds and insulin and following a diabetic diet. She has developed dementia from all the combined problems.
She is very unhappy about the home, even though it is a beautiful place, one of the highest rated in our area. We have a family member already there who loves it. Mom keeps berating me, trying to guilt trip me, and saying if we don't take her out, she'll go out feet first. It has only been two days so far, but she has gotten worse if anything, attitude wise.
Is this normal behavior? Can we expect her to get through the grief and anger and recognize that we're doing the utmost best we can for her? How long can we expect this attitude to last? Is there anything we can do to make the transition easier? Should I tell her that if she continues the abusive behavior, I won't come see her? I am at a loss what to do. It is tearing me up to hear her say these things, although logically I know it is the best thing for her. My wife and I are the only family members who have even tried to take care of her in our home, to no success; we both have serious health issues ourselves.
Can we expect this abuse to continue, or will she eventually understand it's for her own good?