The funeral home used the funds for his cremation but say we have to pay cemetery out of pocket?

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My dad had an irrevocable funeral trust. They are keeping the remaining funds. Is that the way it is supposed to work?

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Read your contract very carefully to see what it covers. Usually the headstone is not part of the package, that is done by the cemetery office.
The trustee (funeral home) can only distribute the excess funds to the estate of the deceased. If no estate account was opened, the funds won't move.
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