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We know by observation what it’s like to grow old and need care. Have you planned for when it’s your turn?

JuliaRose- you brought up a very good question. Thank you for doing that. I look forward to reading all the good answers from the experienced posters in this forum.
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Reply to polarbear
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I was totally clueless about so many things related to being elderly [except for saving for rainy days]. I didn't know certain things even existed. It wasn't until I had to help my very elderly parents that these things came to light.

a) "Elder Law Attorneys", never heard of that specialized field until I came onboard the Aging Care forum many years ago. Now I have a Revocable Trust, Living Will/Medical Directive, Health Power of Attorney, Financial Power of Attorney, Memorial instructions, and anything else that has a signature line.

b) Placed all my financials into the Revocable Trust. Learned that valuable lesson as I had thought my parents had done that with their Trust, but once both passed, oops, Dad didn't transfer everything, there was a two year Probate :P

c) I have on my book shelf a large red 3-ring binder, and within that binder I asked a lot of questions relating to my care and personal effects which would be too much for a Will to handle. Such as if I had any life insurance policies, if yes, where are the policies. What to do with my stamp and coin collection. What to do with my dozen of 3-ring binders related to my family tree. And the name/address of the funeral director and where to place my ashes. And what utilities have automatic pull from my checking account or credit card.

d) Every trash pick-up day, I scout out items in the house that are not worth donating. I try to fill up one large black trash bag. Right now I am eyeing an old radio boom box that hasn't been used in years.

e) One thing I already did this year, I gave to my sig other's grown daughter my Dept 56 Snow Village, 4 bins worth. I haven't assembled the Village in years. Just too tiring at my age now. She and the grand-daughters were thrilled to get the items.

f) I've narrowed down the 55+ community I would prefer to reside, I just like how the floor-plans work, and the community amenities. I will stay in my current house until my 18 year old cat passes on as he is almost blind but still able to easily navigate the house since he's lived here for 16 years. Wouldn't be fair to him to move to a new floor-plan.

g) I plan to keep my land-line. Refuse to give it up as if I need to call 911, the Dispatcher will see my home address automatically on the screen, so if I had stroke and couldn't talk, help would be on the way. With my cellphone, that wouldn't work as I am not glued to my cellphone. I have land-line phones in just about every room of the house.
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Reply to freqflyer
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Treeartist Dec 20, 2018
My goodness, freqflyer!,

This is excellent! I’m going to take a screenshot of this! I especially liked the notebook idea. Did you get all those papers signed through the elder law attorney? I understand that some of them can be found online.
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Excellent question and a key aspect to plan for, yet, I find myself hoping and thinking of what little or not so little bit of life I may be able to build between now and retirement point, that is my dream and my current plan. It is almost my fuel! I feel like I’m on a long break from a life right now.

I know that is not mature, yet it is my perspective for now. Plus, life is so full, full of worries, responsibilities, etc. that I don’t know I could make room for the long term planning for myself.

Far from ideal, yet honest answer.
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Reply to Rosses003
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Drafted a will with POA's that are going to be attorneys that will take payment from our estate. We do not want younger family members burdened with paying our bills. Husband and I visited a cemetery and picked out two beautiful plots on a hill, so we will put that in the will and put money down for it. Have two people identified as medical POA, one primary and one as backup in case the primary dies before we do. We paid off our house, so there will be no debt on it. We don't spend more on our credit card than what we can pay off each month. Our house is small compared to the huge new houses being built and we still enjoy taking care of it, but will hire outside help at age 65 even if I am still able. By age 75, I plan to sell our home, sell most of our belongings we will no longer have use for (china, crystal, lawn tools) and downsize to an apartment. I assume at least one of us will still be healthy at age 75 and able to do this. The kicker is it seems there is a fine line between being able to do it and not.
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Reply to GingerMay
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JuliaRose Dec 17, 2018
Wow! You’ve thought it through and really have a plan!
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Currently I am having a will drawn up, by a certified elder care attorney, to help provide for DW's care.
We separated our funds years ago to ease any possibility of going on medicaid, etc.
The will is also being written that one of the attorneys will act as guardian should the wife survive me. We think this might be less expensive that for a court appointed guardian.
The rest of the will is pretty much the standard stuff.
I am still thinking on the end of life documents. I know that for her, I am not going to allow all of the heroic attempts to keep just the shell of her breathing while the medical establishment runs up the bill to show how great they are.
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Reply to OldSailor
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JuliaRose Dec 17, 2018
Very smart. It’s difficult to make these decisions, but necessary.
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It is very hard to plan for my future, when I have been handling my parents here and now.
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Reply to smeshque
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JuliaRose Dec 17, 2018
Oh, I know what you mean!
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This is a good question. It’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately, what with my MIL being diagnosed with IPF and dying in a matter of months and my moms COPD progressing. We are only 37 and 44 so we haven’t even begun to think about long term care but with my husbands line of work, we really need to get our affairs in order. At this point in his career, it’s much more likely a stroke or heart attack will happen, then being killed or seriously injured will. His retirement will support us and allow us a comfortable lifestyle BUT I am currently a SAHM and I’ve worked a total of 8 years so I need to return to work so I can qualify for Medicare when the time comes. My husband doesn’t pay into social security but I have paid into it and it would be nice to have that extra income even though it won’t be much. But really it’s the medicare that I am worrying about right now. We need to get a trust done in case something happens to one or both of us, that way the surviving spouse & kids will be taken care of financially. My husband is 6 years away from retirement and he’ll choose the option of receiving a smaller monthly pension so that I or the kids can continue to receive it if he should go first. We don’t have life insurance either, well he has one through the city but we ought to look into buying our own policies since our kids are still little. I feel it’s too soon to even think about LTC and LTC policies.
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Reply to worriedinCali
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No I haven't. We have retirement savings and so on but as far as nursing home arrangements etc. no. I keep planning on making a" living will" but keep procrastinating.

I'm hoping I'll die with all my faculties intact but I know instinctively that's foolish thinking and I should plan for the chance that that won't be the case.

Good question though Julia. I'll be interested to hear others remarks.
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