How to get Mom to get out of bed in the morning?

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Mom is 91 years old and has dementia. Every once in a while she decides that she does not want to get out of bed in the morning. I let her sleep until 11 and then wake her up. She usually gets up happy and we start the day in a pleasant manner. Maybe every two weeks or so she will not get out of bed. I hear I feel sick, my legs hurt ( she has severe arthritis) or some other excuse. I start at 11 and come in every hour and try to get her up so she can get some nourishment and liquids. Today its now 1:30 and she will not budge? Could this be the beginnings of depression? I welcome any thoughts or suggestions. Thank you

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I'm 70 and would LOVE to stay in bed all day. I hope "they" don't keep making me get out of bed when I'm in my 90s and long after I have done my life's work. Please, let me have some peace and if I want to stay in bed all day, back off!! Why should I "have" to follow someone else's idea of a schedule??
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I like your singing to her and being cheerful. That must make her feel loved. I have the same problem. Sometimes I play songs. Her mom used to sing "Lazy Mary" to her so I downloaded a few versions from iTunes and play it if we have to get to an appointment. It puts her in a good mood and gets her up. For me the best way to get mom up is to have CNA caregiver who she likes come. She will be an angel for her.
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Gee, severe arthritis at 91. I'm 65 and have osteoarthritis and it can be painful for me to get out of bed. Please...it is not an excuse.
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My mother is bedridden. You may want to consider doing some light stretches with her to help her actually wake-up. Every morning, I spend about 10 - 15 min, massaging her body and stretching her arms and legs. The increased circulation helps with pain of tight muscles from being immobile and it also helps wake her up. Roll her on side to gently massage her neck and back - upper and lower - especially lower back. She'll love it as those muscles are so, so tight!
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Thanks everyone for all your helpful suggestions. I finally went into Mom's room around 1:30 and cheerfully announced that its time to get up. Pulled open the curtains and started singing. She got up and couldn't believe how long she had slept. She even wanted to know why I let her sleep so long!!! When I told her that I had been trying every hour to wake her up she didn't remember any of it. She apologized and after a shower had her breakfast at 2:45!! Little off schedule but each day is an adventure. Love her to pieces. Thanks again.
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My view on this, your Mom is in her 90's, she's tired, let her sleep. Yes it will disrupt usual morning routine but maybe this will be her "new normal".

How many times have teenagers, who are healthy, sleep until noon? Plenty.
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First of all, if this is just happening a couple times of month I really wouldn't worry a lot about it, especially if she is fine and back to baseline the next day.

But if it begins to get more frequent or interferes with the next few days here are some suggestions.

Address the pain issue. Discuss with her doctor good ways to do this. Maybe extra sleep is a good thing on those days.

Light! Open all the curtains/drapes/shades. Turn on lights.

Caffeine. I am seeing a sleep specialist who suggests treating my "Sleep Inertia.".by having a cup of coffee while still in bed, resting another 20 minutes until the caffeine kicks in, and then getting up.

Voices and daytime noises. A radio or people talking elsewhere in the house or a television on somewhere help convince me that it really is time to be awake. (My problem does not include pain, so I don't know if this would apply to your mother.)

But really, I think I'd let the dear old lady sleep in every few weeks! Maybe declare it an official Pajama Day. Offer to help her into a fresh nightie, etc. Help her to the bathroom and to take morning pills, and then either back to bed or sitting up in her most comfortable chair, dozing off as she wants to. I really don't think she is going to get frail and weak with a couple of Pajama Days a month, do you?
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I too like the idea of music. I would also plan different activities that she enjoys doing, to make her more enthused about getting up...i.e., something to look forward to.

There's also the fact that at 91, she just needs more sleep and rest than she would have when she was younger.

Are there are any physical issues or meds she's taking that could cause her to be more tired and unenthused about getting up?
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How bad is her dementia? Can you still reason with her? I'm guessing she wears depends or else you would have another big problem of needing to wash all of her linens on these mornings (or afternoons :) ). Could it be that she is in so much pain that she just doesn't want to move? In that case you could give her one of her pain pills to ease the pain while she is still in bed and then give her the rest with breakfast.....of course she may just fall asleep once the pain is lessened...good luck and blessings to you! Lindaz
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Start earlier and see what happens. You & I both know that getting up is the hardest part of the day. But if she stops, she won't be able to any more.

It takes my mom a good 2+ hours to wake up and be interested in eating.
She used to refuse to get up to go to the bathroom and be so mean & loud to the assistants. I always marveled that she didn't have one big butt sore from staying in wet Depends too long, despite their efforts. Now that she is totally incontinent, the staff at the NH just change her. It's a matter of skin preservation, not patient preference.

Just off the top of my head.....
Turn on all the lights, open the drapes, and make sure the room is bright for day time. Turn on some music as you announce it's time to get up.

Sometimes they will respond to a rhythmical song better than talking, so tell her it's time to get up, and then approach her where she can see you, take her arm to help her up while singing something like "oh when the saints go marching in" or something she would have known in early life. "She'll be coming round the mountain", etc. "She'll be going to the bathroom right away - yes sir!"

Don't be easily swayed by complaints and fussing. Just be persistent. Some days will be good, some not. At some point, it may be helpful to have a lift.
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