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Mum with dementia has incontinence and also rather frequent UTI’s that stink. She had these problems to an extent pre-dementia but obviously her dementia has made things worse as her up keep is not as good.



She lives with me in a rental and I’m getting rather sick of the urine smell!



We try change her depends often but obviously I don’t quite have the timing right! As in, I’ll notice it’s all dry when changing and within 15 min she may have wet the new one and then it’s leaking from the sides or something while she sits etc.



I got rid of all the rugs in her bathroom as it was just too frequent that I’d be washing them. Her bladder would start going before she’d manage to be seated fully on the toilet which meant the toilet mat was getting wet constantly. With her shower mat, there might be dribble as she was entering the shower but she also was in the habit of undressing her dirty depend on the mat rather than placing in bin. So I got rid of these and I placed puppy pee pads in her bathroom instead. At least with these I can just throw them out and replace. It’s actually surprising how warm they feel under feet compared to tile!



In fact I have puppy pee pads all over the place! :( it’s not exactly a nice look but saves my sanity a little. I have them on the arm chairs for instance. I also have them on the most common areas of the floor where mostly urine has been a problem. Ie next to her bed (when she gets up, she has at times decided to change her depend herself and drop on the floor or she may have been in a rush to bathroom and be dribbling). I also have one coming out of the bathroom to catch her feet that may be wet from urine.



Before anyone thinks that I’m not doing enough or I’m lazy,... if I’m there, I ensure it doesn’t happen ie wipe her feet with baby wipes / clean the toilet floor / help her change depend etc. However I’m not there always as I could be asleep for instance when she gets up or simply be doing another duty like laundry.



Anyhow,.. despite the puppy pee pads, changing depends frequently,.. what do others do to keep the place smelling nice? Most of the House is carpet so the smell really sinks in! I have a carpet cleaning machine (Bissel pro-heat) but I don’t want to use this constantly as the carpets take ages to dry, not to mention it’s huge work.
How do they deal with this in nursing/aged care homes? I’ve noticed most of the bedrooms are carpet!



Also Mum has been on a public wait list for surgery relating to her incontinence pre-dementia. They have finally made contact to further this! What do I do?!? Is there point now that she has dementia? Would they still do something? She can’t write anymore or answer some question so I’m not sure she’d be eligible for surgery and I don’t have POA. I know she’d want it (she still talks about it as she knows she’s on a wait list) but will it actually help anything now? How do I tell her she might no longer be eligible for something she has waited ages for. Before anyone says get a POA,.. I’ve addressed that in another post.. I can’t get her evaluated. I’ve been trying for ages. No doctor wants to evaluate her capacity and Mum refuses to go back to the Dementia clinic who initially just gave us the forms.



But how do I keep my house clean of urine smell? Any tips and recommendations welcome!

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It is tough indeed. Change pads frequently. All wet incontinence pads go right to outside trash bin…never store in house for later. Wet undies soaking in water immediately. No rewearing of dried wet items ever…That has eliminated our problems with it.
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My LO & aides must be either 'nose blind' or have given up.
I know the problem cannot be cured & I try to ensure the bins are out, windows open to air etc but the strong odour remains. It was especially offensive recently. I suspect it is in the carpet.

NHs have easy to mop floors, can get industrial cleaners in for carpets & replace carpets & mattresses from time to time.

I suppose those charcoal or other odour absorbers NHs use would be my suggestion.

If a really long view is needed, remove all carpets.
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I just want to say you are NOT lazy. Big hugs to you.
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First of all, if there's as much urine and leakage as you're saying, your mom needs more than a Depend can provide. She needs to be in a diaper. I highly recommend Depend-brand diapers (they call them briefs) with a trimmed down baby diaper used as a liner. There will be zero leaks and no smell. The baby diapers have built-in odor control and the urine turns into a gel within the diaper itself so the surface stays dry. They're paper-thin too.
As for the carpets. Invest in a rug shampooer. They are as easy to use as a vacuum cleaner. I recommend the Hoover double-brush roller model. In between shampooing use Arm & Hammer litter box deodorizer powder. Sprinkle some on the carpet when you vacuum. It smells really nice and your house will always be smelling fresh. If there's urine on the furniture upholstery or in the padding of wall-to-wall carpeting there is a spray product called Pooph. A member of this forum recommended it to me. I have never seen a product that worked like this. I was an in-home caregiver for 25 years and I've cleaned up every kind of revolting incontinence and filth. Pooph gets rid of the urine and even crap smell from furniture and rugs. They even have a Pooph for laundry. I'm telling you, this gets the smell out like nothing else and believe me I have tried everything else.
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Ariadnee Dec 2022
I like using Zout for small to moderate sized stains. It's a pre-treatment laundry spray made in Canada in a red bottle.
The most recent use was on an oxford cloth, white, button down cotton shirt that had a cluster of tiny red wine stains on it. The shirt had been sitting about four days before I tried Zout, I had my doubts about it working on what was a perfect storm of red wine and soft cotton staining....Zout got it out.
It's not perfect on poopy stains, but there is at least a 75% improvement of the treated areas. Urine hasn't been an issue-yet, will see how that goes.
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Diaper Dust does just that! You can find it on Amazon or it's cheaper on the website thediaperdust.com it's charcoal based so it'd black but you sprinkle it INTO to depends before throwing it away. Look at the reviews, it's AMAZING!!
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When the weather is nice i air the house out like all day with fans blasting through out. I also cut up pieces of irish spring and hide them around the house. I put the toilet pot and trashcans after theyre cleaned outside to sit in the sun like 20 min this really helps the smell the most. Then i just hope for the best when people visit they dont smell anything but i have no idea. I got really nose blind to urine now
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Ariadnee Dec 2022
Is it possible to ask a close friend to give you smell feedback?
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I went to Bed Bath and Beyond and bought a home air cleaner which is plugged in to an outlet near his bed in our small library. Later got a bigger one which is plugged into an outlet right by his hospital bed. I have asked my brothers to LET ME KNOW if they smell urine when entering our home. I cherish my home and do not want it to smell like a third-rate nursing home. Neither of them has reported smelling urine. I believe if one deals with it constantly as I do in keeping my poor demented husband clean, one may become inured to the smell, so... Lots of small businesses bought these for Covid purposes, so you can find them pretty easily. I paid $40 for one and about $110 for the other. Look around. you'll find what you need.
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Cappuccino42 I too an so sorry that you have had to go through this with your Mum. I came across something called Odo Ban sold in the big stores like Home depot in gallon containers. It is also in a spray bottle but be aware its very strong and potent. The spray containers are sealed shut never to be open. I hope you are able to get the area smelling nice and clean again. And don't worry about what others think in reference to your attending and the time you have placed on this never ending task of taking care of a parent. One hour at a time is how I do it.
God bless
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NurseReggi Nov 2022
Have you looked into using Diaper Dust?
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We use charcoal closet deodorizers under the beds and behind the dresser and nightstands.

We use baking soda fridge packs alongside the closet deodorizers.

But our go-to is to spray things with vinegar/water combo (or unscented Fabreeze which is a baking soda/alcohol combo) and then place a portable dehumidifier unit into the room. Four hours later, the spot is dry and also smell-free.

While a dehumidifier unit is more expensive, it has saved so much on having to buy chemicals or our time cleaning (you know the saying time is money) that it is one of the best investments we've made in this process. It can be rolled from room to room and also set on a 2 or 4-hour timer so it shuts itself off.
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NurseReggi Nov 2022
Have you looked into Diaper Dust? It's a charcoal based powder that goes into the depends/diaper before throwing it away. I'm part of a big community and they all say it'd the only thing they use now
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I just read your reply to someone who commented on your post and I was going to tell you to try NaturesMiracle too! It works great but yes, very expensive when you’re having to use a lot of it. One time I just happened to be looking for some on Chewy and caught it at the right moment when it was marked down to just under $3 a bottle (compared to $10+) and I ordered half a dozen. I used it in laundry, in a spray bottle for the bed as well as the carpets. I used it up FAST as you can imagine but by the time I needed more they already had a new packaging line of the product and it was back to regular pricing.

I bought some on eBay too. Problem there is since it’s a liquid and heavy if ordering more than one, shipping was expensive and it counteracted the fair price they were charging.

One idea for carpeting that my sister in-law would do after her dog(s) had accidents was firstly soak up the spot with a towel or two. (You may want to buy a few cheap towels, white or light so you can bleach them, and I find the thinner towels absorb better than big thick type.) Then using a vinegar and water solution, wash it up a little, then soak that up as much as possible. Then she would cover the spot with baking soda (buy a few big boxes of it) and pat it down onto the spot, getting it into the leftover dampness on the rug and then she’d leave it a few days to absorb the rest of the dampness and urine. You can place another towel over it (or anything, even foil or a rag etc) just to avoid walking thru it. Then over a few days it will absorb the rest of the wetness and left over urine. Then she’d brush it off (for area rugs) outside (not sure how she’d do it for larger carpets) and she’d vacuum up the remaining. It would be slightly damp sometimes from soaking up all that liquid so you’ll have to be careful with your vac and would need to clean it afterward. It did work well for her.

I tried it too when our dog peed inside periodically and I thought it worked well. But with a husband and kids, all of who don’t pay attention, they’d walk thru it and get it on their feet or shoes and track it thru the house and then they’d have to wash their feet etc and I’d have to clean it and sometimes redo it. (I didn’t think of covering the areas at that time. It’s an after thought!) I mention all that so you’ll know of the dilemmas associated with doing so ahead of time. I learned along the way. But it’s a chemical free method and I try to do as much as I can with natural products. I don’t want my dogs to get sick from all those other cleaning products.

When my MIL leaves we will need to do a complete cleaning of the carpets. Between her accidents (which have been many) and five dogs and three cats and 7-8 people living here since we moved in, they’re a wreck I’m sure! Eventually we want to pull it up and lay flooring down. Then we would buy large area rugs. Much easier to keep up with.

So I would just buy white vinegar and baking soda in bulk. They’re the cheapest way to clean and safest!

I also use an empty shaker container like a grated cheese or a large herb/spice bottle and fill it with baking soda which can be mixed with some cornstarch as well. You can add a few drops of essential oil to it too. I sprinkle it all over the top of my MILs bed mattress and leave for the day to absorb dampness and order. Then vacuum it off before making the bed. She wears diapers too but they would leak sometimes. Have to buy the nighttime ones. We use them day and night bcuz they absorb better. Finally I also bought some pads and I line her bed with them under the sheet. The sheet holds them in place. They have saved me a ton of work. I was constantly having to wash her mattress pad. Such a chore! If she were in her right mind I would put one directly under her on top of the sheet to try and avoid having to wash her sheets so much. But she would notice it for sure and then rip it up and pick the stuff out of it. Maybe even try to eat it!
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First I'm going to say I'm sorry you are struggling to keep up with this. My dad has vascular dementia & before he was bedbound I had to keep changing his pull up pants, had bed pads allover the place & used carpet cleaner. It can make you feel low.
My dad now has been supplied with pads that absorb a lot of pee & held in place by elasticated pants. They really do the trick. These are supplied by the NHS in UK but as dad has fecal incontinence then I've ordered these pads on line.
What I advise is that you talk to a Dr & a continence nurse to see if you can get the pads free. Also you need to talk to a social worker for adult care to see if you can get help extra help to have respite & carers to help to you look after mum. While someone looks after mum you can get a rest or go out & go out for a few hours, or catch up with the chores.
You really need help from the Dr & nurses to work out the best incontinence pads. Or whether she needs to have a catheter but that can cause UTIs .
The pads & pants are as follows: Abena
Abri San premium.
Size 10 holds most liquid & can be used at nights. They have an indicator when they need changing. Number 8s can be used in the day. You get 21 pads in a pack. The. To hold them in place you need Abena abri fix pants. They come in medium /large /X large. The tighter they are the more better for pad to be snug.
Hope this helps .
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You can put vinegar in dishes around the house. A friend recommended it after my Mom had an explosion. I cleaned with Pinesol and bleach and still could not get the smell out of her area. I put a bowl of vinegar, where she could not get to it, out and within 2 hrs there was a difference, a day later no smell but I kept it out 2 days.

Mom and UTIs. Mom was put on cranberry tablets and a probiotic to stem the UTI. She never had another UTI from then till a year later when she passed. Alva, a nurse, swears by D-Mannose.
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Ariadnee Dec 2022
Vinegar in a bowl works so well! I've used this technique for years near the cat litter boxes, the vinegar neutralizes the smell perfectly, the cats (5) never ever bother with it-too stinky for 'em?
When urine incontinence or other smells as generated by my husband with Frontal Temporal dementia, become a problem here, and they will, will start with large bowls of vinegar to help with the stench.
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Good Afternoon,

Vinegar and Baking soda works wonders for clothing too, any type of sour smell.

The bathroom Mango & Hibiscus Lysol. Air out the dwelling everyday and keep up with the bathroom and bedding. I do my bathroom 2x daily, everyone remarks how clean things are. Rubber gloves of course.

Before the mats from the hospital store were delivered, I used trash bags over the mattress and below the bedding sheets.

You can make do until the right stuff comes in. The main thing is to keep up with everything. I know it's a grind but these things really do work.

Hope this helps...
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I swear by vinegar. It kills the enzymes that cause the odor. Do not dilute it, use straight 5%. Spray everything right before bed to freshen and give it time to dry. It doesn't smell once it is dry. Spray her bedroom when she gets up for the day.

Carpet needs to be saturated, because what might appear to be a dribble on top, could very well be plate size in the pad.

Don't clean with boiling water, it can set odors and break down cleaners. Use hot water or warm.

My friend had her dad and the carpet was messed all over, she cleaned it with arm and hammer with oxy-clean laundry detergent. No more smell. She tells everyone how awesome it worked, because it was bad.

Hospitals in my city clean with odor-ban, it has a eucalyptus smell and sanitizes. It needs to be diluted or the smell will get you.

I use essential oil diffusers to add a nice fragrance in my home. Lemon, orange, lime with May Chang EOs smell clean, it also has some antibacterial properties to cleanse the air. It won't cover up or hide odors though. Just freshen the air.

Best of luck, this is tough to live with.
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Is mom wearing an absorbent disposable incontinence underwear?
The picture I have in my head of your moms place is the floors are covered with protective pads because she "leaks"
Oh, most Memory Care, Rehab, Skilled Nursing facilities do not have carpet on the floors. If they have carpet in "common" areas it is a very low nap carpet that cleans easily and dries fast and most are squares that can be removed and replaced with new squares. Carpet is a trip hazard and difficult to use wheelchairs, walkers and canes on carpet.
there are 2 products that worked well for me
OdorBan sold in gallon bottles it can be diluted at various strengths to be used as an air freshener all the way to a sanitizer. It is enzyme based so it kills odors not just covers them up.
Clorox has a Urine Remover that works well on clothes and solid surfaces.
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Isthisrealyreal Mar 2022
Grandma, the upper end facilities in my area have carpet in the entire facility. Indoor/outdoor carpet but carpeted throughout.
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