My mother passed Christmas day in 2018 while in Hospice in a hospital. I witnessed her suffer tremendous, excruciating pain as the staff could not control her pain (despite their promise to "make her comfortable and control her pain"). I stayed with her for 13 long days and nights, right by her side until she took her last breath. I STILL have PTSD from that which I relive over and over again . She was married to my father for almost 60 years. My father was never the same after she died.
My father passed away last week from Sepsis while I held his hand at the same hospital my beloved mother passed away in. (The hospital they were at failed to properly diagnose him and it was too late by the time they did).
I am beyond devastated and just feel totally alone and empty. It literally took all I had to get out of bed this morning.
I know people are saying "well, they are together now and no more pain for either one of them" but that doesn't help, unfortunately. I hurt...the pain of them not being here is almost too much. "Time" did not help me at all after my mother passed. Not at all. Being isolated from friends and family during this Pandemic doesn't help either. I just want to be with my parents.
Any advice would be most appreciated.