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My moms speech has gradually gotten worse over the past 2 years and now has a hard time forming simple words and her memory of simple things is deteriorating. She lives by her self, she drives, cleans house, and gardens which I'm sure this all good for her. But my question is, she see's several doctors for her heart, dermatologist, primary, and a PA to change pessary. She had an MRI brain scan and she said it didn't show any problems. How is it that the doctors haven't diagnosed her for her speech and memory problem. She was a nurse and probably hides it from them and my brother and I live 2000 miles away. We visit and she will stays with us during the winter, but what is the best way to get a diagnosis?

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She likely needs a referral to a neurologist for a neuropsych exam. Try to find a neurologist that "specializes" in dementia. Many neurologists don't really like to treat dementia patients since there isn't a lot of treatment available that will improve cognition. If you are luck enough to have a teaching hospital in her city, they may have a dementia specialty center.
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I was there in June and she is much better when people are around. I'm going back in October to go to the Dr. with her. Just trying to get a head start on what to ask the Dr.
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By the way, trusting your mother to correctly report what the doctor told her if she is having impairments like you describe is not the best idea. You will get the best information directly from the doctor's office. Your mother may have told you incorrect information. My MIL outright lied about the fact that her Parkinson's had advanced to incontinence and dementia.
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It could be that her doctors aren't that informed with her type of condition and maybe, they didn't do the right test. A doctor's visit can be quite short, with just yes or no answers needed.

Does she have a neurologist? I might try to consult with one to address your concerns. I'd hope that they can properly diagnose her. With my LO, they not only did an MRI, but, referred out for a Neuropschological eval.

Have you stayed in the home with your mom for a few days to see just how well she is faring? I'd think that might be helpful, so the doctor can get as much info about her abilities as possible.
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