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She has asked this twice and the look on her face when I tell her she is going to have to stay in her hospital bed which is in our large TV room, and I can't take care of her in her bedroom which is 1/3 rd the size of the TV room and I need room to fit the hoyer lift.


What do you say without hurting her feelings?

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Is this set up to be her bedroom or is she merely in a bed in a community room? I would do as much as possible to make the room her private space. Bring in her familiar things and hang curtains or use screens, remove as much furniture as you can into her old room..... you may actually like having your own tiny TV/sitting room separate from the rest of the house.
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Reply to cwillie
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Mom may equate a hospital bed with being “sick” or even dying. And she’s not in a bonafide bedroom which is also upsetting. My husband’s bed is in our family room as well. I finally shoved his hoyer in our unused master bedroom and his power wheelchair is in the middle of the living room. Fun, isn’t it? Our homes look like durable medical equipment showrooms.

What about bringing some things from her bedroom into the tv room? Maybe a chair or even a few photos or other chachkis? You might as well. It may give her peace to look at those things. If she does have dementia, telling her she “has to” do something will automatically illicit a “push-back” response. Trying to reason also usually won’t work.
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Reply to Ahmijoy
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I would think the hospital bed is more comfortable. You don't say if Mom has Dementia or ALZ. If she has either, no matter how many times u tell her she won't remember. Don't tell her she won't go back to her bed. Tell her for now she needs to use the HB for now because it makes it easier to get her in and out of bed. Her other room is just too small for the equipment u need.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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