Hi. I'm new here. My mom has always been eccentric and difficult. She is almost 89 and up until 2 months ago was living in a retirement community in the independent living section. We had a hired caregiver with her 3x a week mainly to help with grocery shopping, laundry etc. Mom has been in Depends for 5 years for urinary incontinence but frequently leaked through. But her main issue was her memory - not who were were but short term things. She also lost all her math skills so I've been handling her finances for 5 years. I now see that we probably missed some signs of other issues due to her usual eccentric ways. But - two months ago she fell - it was attributed to her bad hip. She didn't really injure herself but the weird thing - to me at least - is that she seems to have almost completely lost it mentally. Is that unusual? She still knows who everyone is but has become completely unreasonable and has no judgement skills. After the fall we moved her to assisted living with help the same 3 days. After a month it was clear she wasn't going to make it there. The place she lives let us stay a while so we could find a good nursing facility - as long as we had someone with her from when she gets up until bed time. We have found a nice place and are planning to move her in a week. Of course she is having a fit and is refusing to move. My brother helps out some what but has made the moving process more difficult by trying to accommodate her - "I'll go if you find a place that..." We'd find "that" and she would see the place and refuse. I realized this was a stalling tactic immediately but my brother is having difficulty accepting her dementia diagnosis. That said - he finally got tired of taking her to see places. She can't really walk - very short distances with her walker but mainly uses a wheelchair. Okay - finally getting to my point. She is now having poop accidents and is getting it all over her hands. It's breaking my heart watching what use to be a smart, independent, adventuresome woman become a unreasonable, tantrum throwing child. Like I said - she's always been difficult - think Meryl Streep in August Osage County but without the excuse of drugs. I have a 22 year old son with sevear autism who functions at a two year old level living at home. The stress of it all is almost more than I can deal with. So - how do you all stay sane?